“I guess I just don’t love you anymore.”

“W… why? Why did you say that?”

“Because you left me, Lucas! You left me alone with nothing but a broken heart and a pile of debt to fall back on. I can’t do this anymore.”

The two stood there, staring at each other for the longest time before tears began streaming down their faces. ‘This is it,’ thought Eliott as he felt his chest constrict. He was finally going to be free. This was it. The end. Everything would finally be over. But then, in the blink of an eye, it was already over. His eyes were blurry as he saw Lucas run away, crying loudly. The world seemed to move at a slow pace as he watched him leave. The only thing Eliott could hear was his loud sobs. It wasn’t until a police officer came up to him that he snapped out of his trance.

"Are you okay?" asked the officer as they helped Eliott sit back down on a nearby park bench. ‘No, not really,’ thought Eliott. He tried his best to answer the officer’s question but he couldn' find anything to say. All he wanted to do was sleep, but the only way he was going to get any was if he went to jail. That’s what happens when people betray you. They lock you away from everyone you ever cared about.

“Hey, are you alright? Are you hurt?” said another voice as a hand touched his shoulder. Eliott looked up at the policeman to see who had interrupted his thoughts. In front of him stood a blonde man, around the same age as himself.

“Yes, I’m fine,” said Eliott as he wiped the tears from his face. He wasn't lying. He didn't know why he was crying though. Maybe it was the overwhelming sense of betrayal coursing through his veins. Maybe it was because he knew this would happen someday. Maybe it was all a part of life's cruel cycle. Whatever it was, Eliott felt like he was done living. Like the moment someone betrayed you, you lost your will to live. He couldn't remember the last time he had slept properly. The lack of sleep was getting to him.

“Can you tell me where you're staying? I'll escort you home,” said the policeman. Eliott gave his address and after making sure the officer was following along, he got up and walked off. A part of him hoped that Lucas wouldn't be at his place. After everything that had happened between them, Eliott didn't want to risk seeing him again. But, he also knew that if he didn't show up at his door, he' d probably never go back to his apartment.

Eliott spent most of his walk home trying to ignore the stares from other people. Everyone who passed by him looked like they had seen a ghost. There was no one walking next to him either. No one saying hello or giving him a smile. Not even a nod of acknowledgement. Eliott didn't blame them. He was a mess. He was covered in bruises and cuts. He was wearing a hoodie that was too big for him and sweatpants that were too small. He looked like a homeless person. And he was.

When Eliott arrived at his apartment building, he took a deep breath before entering. He pushed open the door to his apartment, his body still shaking slightly. As soon as he stepped foot inside the apartment, he heard someone sobbing. At first, he didn't think much of it. Then he heard it again. He followed the sound and found it coming from the bathroom. Eliott approached the door quietly so he didn' t make any noise. Once he reached the doorway, he saw Lucas curled up in a ball against the wall. His hands were covering his mouth as he cried, his shoulders shaking violently. Eliott couldn't help but notice how beautiful he looked like this. Lucas had always been good looking but this made him even more beautiful in Eliott' s eyes. He wanted to take care of him. To comfort him. To hold him close and tell him everything would be alright. But, he hesitated. What if Lucas didn't want him near him? What if Eliott pushed him away again? Eliott knew that Lucas was hurting so bad. He wanted to fix it. But, how? How could he possibly fix what had broken them?

After what felt like hours, Lucas stopped crying, his breathing becoming normal. When he noticed that Eliott was standing in the doorway, he quickly stood up, wiping away his tear stained cheeks. “I'm sorry,” he whispered. Eliott shook his head. He didn' t need an apology. They both had something to apologise for. Eliott needed an explanation.

"What happened? Is someone bothering you?" asked Eliott. Eliott could understand being worried about your friend. But, it wasn't right to have someone bother Lucas while he was feeling this upset.

"It's... it's nothing," mumbled Lucas, taking a step forward so that he was inches away from Eliott. He stared into his eyes for several seconds before speaking again.

"You've been avoiding me." It wasn't a question. Eliott knew Lucas wouldn't allow himself to ask if he hadn't meant it.

"I haven' t been avoiding you," said Eliott, his voice sounding weak to his own ears.

"Really? Because you keep hiding behind my back whenever we're in a group chat. And I haven't seen you since our fight."

"Look, I... I'm sorry. I should have told you sooner, but..."

"But you don't trust me anymore," finished Lucas, his face growing stern. Eliott didn't say anything in response. He couldn't. It felt like Lucas was physically hitting him in the stomach with every word he spoke.

"Is that why you moved out? So you wouldn't have to see me anymore?"

"I-"

"Why did you move out if you hate me so much?"

"That's not true!" Eliott yelled. His words echoed throughout the room causing Lucas to flinch. "I never hated you, Lucas. Never."

"So... why did you leave?"

"I..." Why couldn't he just come clean? Couldn't he just say what Lucas wanted to hear? He was so tired and it was killing him. "I can't do this anymore."

"Do what? We just broke up!"

"And I can't handle being apart from you anymore."

"Oh. Oh." The silence between the two was deafening. "Well," Lucas started. "That explains a lot." With that statement, Lucas stormed out of the apartment, slamming the door shut as he left.

Eliott was left standing there, shocked. His whole body was numb. He felt numb inside. His entire body felt heavy. Everything just felt hopeless. Everything felt wrong. He had no idea how he was gonna survive the rest of his life. Even now, he couldn't bring himself to believe in any of it. There was no point. Nothing was going to change. Lucas would still stay distant from him. They'd still argue and they'd still bicker. It was inevitable. Eliott knew that. But, he didn't think it would hurt this badly.