STORY STARTER

Write a story about someone who works as a janitor for a company that hires superheroes.

Think about what kinds of messes might they be asked to clean up, or what they overhear as they do their job.

Expert in hygienic science and collateral damage restoration - I Fix The Fuck Ups

A thankless fuckin’ job. That’s what it is. Thankless, but necessary.

Ya think Ice Queen has the hard job? Must be SO hard slingin’ those icicles at thugs.

Whatever those supes do ain’t nothing compared to what I gotta do day to day.

Ya ever think about what goes on after the fights?

Someone’s gotta siphon all the toxic acid Reflux is spewin’.

Someone’s gotta clean up the rubble after MAX!MUS has another freak out (I swear, he plows through at least 3 fuckin’ buildings a day).

And ya know what? Someone’s gotta clean up all the other crap the supes wreck. If we left half shit they call “collateral damage” lyin’ out on the streets, people would want supes outta the system faster than Taco Bell runs through MY system.

And that’s where I come in. Freddie Fuckin’ Lance. And no, Fuckin’ ain’t my middle name.

I’m an expert. At least, that’s what my resume says. “Expert in hygienic science and collateral damage restoration”. Basically means I fix their fuck ups.

Anyway, I oughta bounce. Just heard half a city block bein’ destroyed, so the agency’s gonna need me soon.

Comments 1

🌳Eve🌳

3 years ago

I love how Freddie Lance has his own accent.We can relate to him more with it. Also, ‘And no, F**kin’ ain’t my middle name’ line cracked me up. But perhaps you could use some other swear words besides from ‘f**k’. (I’m not saying that you should cut out swear words entirely, because the swearing is what makes this humorous, but using others like sh*t or a** could make this more interesting.) Great writing!