My awakening was like rain harping on a metal rooftop, or a man raising his hand to the innocent. My awakening jolted me in to a whole new state of being. It transformed me in ways that I am beginning to fear were harmful. It changed me. My whole being. Flipped, in a matter of seconds. The shock of the defibrillator paddles against my chest. I’m in horror of this new self. I’m seemingly out of my body, my soul floating and dancing with the night fog. I watched the scene from overhead, realizing that this was it. This was my awakening. I saw the car, totaled in a muddy ditch. The skid marks on the rainy road. I heard a noise. A flatline? But who’s dying? Me. My awakening, the moment I prayed and prayed for, started and ended at the very same moment. As I realized that I was somehow floating away, floating upwards, I felt it. My awakening.