“Another water with lemon?”

“Yes, please,” Larissa said.

With a clunk, the waitress set the glass down on the cafe table. The water sloshed on the table. Droplets landed on her well creased paperback. Larissa rubbed her book cover with the hem of her jacket. This was her fourth glass of water. Her bladder was about to bust. But she wasn’t going to move from this seat at this outdoor cafe. This time would be different.

Larissa was a good girl. Her mother taught Sunday school. Her daddy served as a deacon. And every Sunday found her in church, front and center. Larissa smoothed a hand over her long sweater. I should have worn the flowery dress, she thought. Nervously she glanced up and down the street as she sipped at her water.

Larissa was never one to make a fuss. With three older brothers and a baby sister, she learned to never ask for too much. And she had the church. There was choir practice and mission work. Her mother was thrilled Larissa never got boy crazy the way some girls did. The waitress circled her table.

Larissa pretended to look for something urgent in her purse.

At first Larissa didn’t understand liking girls was a bad thing. It was as natural as breathing in and out. Quickly she got the message and hid in plain sight, pretending to be shy instead of disinterested in dating boys. It worked for a while until college. Her friends were always trying to play matchmaker. Matchmaking led to her friend’s brother, Thomas.

Awkward around people, Thomas was the first person Larissa came out to. He was easy to talk to and pretending with him was easier than standing on the truth alone. Larissa checked her phone for the fiftieth time. No text from Josie. She’d tried so hard to be good. She married Thomas and set up house. Soon there would be children and Sunday school. Until Josie. She was just a thumbnail on the screen, an attendee on an online prayer group.

They had so much in common. Same traditional religious background, same need to please, Josie was Larissa’s spirit in another body. They texted and called each other everyday. Thomas had to tell Larissa she was falling in love for the first time. They talked all night before Larissa asked Josie to meet up in real life.

Maybe Thomas is right. Josie was a complete stranger. A voice on the phone, pixels on a screen. Thomas was the person she was supposed to be with, right. Am I really upending my life for someone I don’t know from Adam. Larissa thought. She slammed close her book. Her eyes burned. She left in a huff.

“Miss, Miss, you dropped yout book, “Left Hand of Darkness, excellent taste, beautiful.”

With a pixie cut and lovely long lashes, the stranger from another table handed Larissa her book. They held each other gaze for a long moment before looking away. She tucked her book in her coat pocket. She read it as a child late at night with a flashlight while her family slept. Larissa didn’t know why she grabbed it today. Something to keep her company iwhen Josie didn’t show.

A warm flush spreading from her toes to her crown as Larissa walked to her car. In a couple of days she knew Josie would reach out with an excuse and tearful promises to turn up next time. Again. Larissa turned around and noticed the stranger was checking her out. Driving away, Larissa set her book on the passenger seat and smiled to herself.