The Clock Keeps His Promise
Ode to the timer
Which others disdain
Your hands move in toil
But never in vain
And ode to the promise
In all that you measure
Your word is your bond
And you are my treasure
Ode to the timer
Which others disdain
Your hands move in toil
But never in vain
And ode to the promise
In all that you measure
Your word is your bond
And you are my treasure
When I tackled this prompt I found it soOooo much fun! Reading it back, mine made an extreme mockery. And now I’m not sure that I hit all the right buttons!
In contrast, although the subject is silly, this has a veil of seriousness.
Yes, that was the nature of the brief—but I think this is clever, because (accidental or not) you’ve expressed the clock’s value to the keeper, through structure as well as through word choice and rhythm (creating tone of voice) ✍🏼👏🏼⭐️
The structure—two stanzas—brings balance to the poem and strengthens the idea that both are valued in equal measure. Also ‘the coupling’ can infer a bond—a unification through partnership. Great way to use structure to drill a message home!
🙌🏼
In the first stanza, each line has a syllabic count of five. But in the second stanza there is a shift. The things ‘of measure’ are stretched to 6 syllables.
✍🏼👏🏼
Its interesting that “your word is your bond” is ‘tied’ to the syllabic count of the first stanza. ✍🏼👏🏼
I don’t know if the things I mentioned were intentional as I well know that somethings words and syntax find their own rhythm. And all we have to do is feel! Nevertheless, I enjoyed this poem. 🥰
Words like ‘toil,’ ‘disdain,’ and ‘vain’ and ‘hands’ are humanising which brings a validation to the clock—to be worthy of a relationship.
As for a simple ode, that bore a heavy task, it got me ticking! Nice job! 🤩🥰