Again
this is broken.
this is pain.
this hurts.
what happened?
what happened to you?
to me?
to us?
you said you loved me.
we planned a future.
i loved you.
can we still work?
can this broken potential work?
Comments 1
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this is broken.
this is pain.
this hurts.
what happened?
what happened to you?
to me?
to us?
you said you loved me.
we planned a future.
i loved you.
can we still work?
can this broken potential work?
Nice work. Short, pointed, and raw. The formatting fits the subject/theme. I also dig no caps, lends to the informality found in the intimacy they have(had). The only thing I’d do is Lose the last line. Instead, maybe consider changing the title to ‘Potential’ or ‘Broken’ or ‘Broken?’ to allow the reader to make that connection instead of feeding it to them directly.
Well done.
