Rick hears a door close behind him and is greeted by a world unseen by man. There are two moons, one purple and one pink glowing in the distance. The night sky is as bright as the daylight, but shows a dappling of stars through the emerald sky. The air smelled sweet, almost like a fruity taffy, and he could see the scent trails as they traveled through the space. The night sky was broken up by huge canopies of mushroom trees, all different warm-colored shades blazing through the horizon.

Rick looked down and was greeted by the sentient grass that lived beneath his feet. It was as if the sky and the ground had swapped palettes, where the grass was sky blue. The grass color started to change as his emotions did, like that mood ring he bought at a county fair when he was in middle school. The climate also changed by the minute, with some moments being incredibly cold, and others being intensely humid. Once he had taken that all in, he looked across from him and noticed a tall woman walking towards him.

“Hey there!” she called out to him.

“Hi”

“Is this your first time?”

“Here? Yes. Being pulled into another dimension? Not quite.”

Ah, yes. Where Rick was from this was all too common. Do you have a dentist appointment at 4:30? I’ll give you one guess where you’ll be at 3. Rick looked down at his phone to check the time, and noticed that his display had turned into a picture of a dog peeing on an elderly woman’s leg.

“The time’s broken for me too. See?”

The woman’s phone showed a picture of a baby doing a backflip over a cat tower.

“Why’s it all pets?”

Rick shrugged. He couldn’t care less about all of this bric a brac, he just wanted to get on with it. He noticed movement in the grass, and saw rocks that moved like crabs do. He started to pick them up, looking under them as if they had any clues.

“What are you doing that for?”

“Last time I was caught in one of these, there was a key under the ashtray.”

“Ashtray? What place did you go to where there was an ashtray?”

“It teleported me to Vermont in the 80s.”

“I see.”

The woman also started to look under the rocks but, after finding nothing, she also realized that they were at an impasse. She reached in her purse to grab her wallet, and it grew wings and flapped away.

“I guess I’ll have to cancel my cards again.” she huffed. 

Now that they had realized that there was no easy way out for him this time, Rick decided to be a gentleman and extend his hand. 

“Richard Thomas. Nice to meet you.”

“Joan Jett.”

“...Wait, you’re not serious are you?”

“Of course I’m not serious, I was just wondering if you were old enough to know who Joan Jett was.”

Rick nodded. “But it is Joan?”

“Joan, yes.”

“Well, Joan, what are you late for right now?”

“Tennis practice. You?”

“A Joan Jett concert.”

“Now you’re really screwing with me.”

“I am screwing with you, I’m going to a Rascal Flatts concert.”

At this point, they had both decided to lay down on the ground and let the grass scan them. The light blue turned into dark red for Rick, and bright pink for Joan.

“Are you angry, Rick?”

“Furious.”

“Why?”

“I paid $100 for my ticket.”

They both had a hearty laugh, the grass turning lime green. Just then a door opened just 100 feet away from them. They both stood up in a hurry, looking at each other, then looking at the door. They had the same thought: only one person can fit in. Rick and Joan bolted towards the door. Rick started out in the front with his burst of energy. However, Joan started to gain ground due to her longer strides. They both reach out and then-

BOOM!

A teenager bumps into both of them, knocking all three of them out of the doorway. The door closes abruptly. The teenager stands up and gasps, taking in all of the sights. It must be his first time. The grass around Rick and Joan turns a deep red, quivering in anger. They both lean on their elbows, looking up at the teenager, and looking back at each other.

“How long do you think we’re stuck now, Rick?”

“Hell, I don’t know.” Rick said, letting himself plop back onto the ground.