Past the constant pain and the daily grind. Past the pills and the doctors that muddle my mind. Past the misery and the despair. Past worrying if I’ll always be there. To a place where my niece is finishing school. Embarrassed by her uncle who still thinks he’s cool. To seeing my other babies grow up. To finishing school and raising a cup. If I had a prayer it would be for this place. For a life I could live beyond pain’s embrace. I know it won’t come, at least not for a while. So until it does I’ll continue to smile.