“Breaking News folks, Doctor and Scientist Noah Herodias, has discovered an invisible cell that only exists in humans.

He’s coined his discovery the God Cell, and essentially the cell operates as one organism, but simultaneously exists in each and every human. And it is this cell that gives humans the ability to believe and have faith.

So essentially, to make this really simple for our viewers watching from home. Religion exists because of this cell, and according to Dr. Herodias with some beta-blockers you can remove religion from the face of the earth, we’re everyone to take this yet to be developed drug.

But not everyone is as excited by the most important scientific breakthrough in history. Many of the most religious countries are in upheaval all around the world. There’s reports of rioting, looting, and murder. Wait, what is this…more breaking news folks, the Pope has just resigned. Oh, wait and the Taliban have disbanded. My goodness, what a day, The President of the United States of America has ordered that the government will operate free of any religious mention, ritual, or practice concerning a ‘God’.

I’m Lisa and this WBATV on Channel 7 signing off. We’ll be bringing you more to the min updates as this story continues. “

I grabbed the remote and turned off the TV. Kneeling before my sofa, I close my eyes and prayed out loud, “God if your out there, this isn’t looking good. And God if I’m praying to myself, I pray you would give me the strength to answer my own prayers.”