**_ADON_** I never really thought of my own life much. I’m not selfless—or caring. It’s just that I never really thought I amounted to something, compared to other people. I was less than, and therefore unimportant. And that was fine. But what was not fine was the avoidance. I needed people, I craved people. I needed someone to hold onto, someone’s chest to bury my face in. I wanted to be loved. But in this life, some people love others more than they love you, and I was left and forgotten. —— We went to a public beach one day, when I was twelve and had not yet met Jack, with some of my stepfather’s friends. They were all rich, of course, and all White. Though some had deep, rich tans that they so loved to have. My mother, light-skinned with long, curly hair, was chatting with the other wives, while my stepfather talked to his pals in low tones, chuckling when one told a joke that made no sense to me at the time. There were no other kids except me and my sister, who at the time