Dear Theo

I have to start this out by saying I love you. If you hate me for this, I wouldn't blame you, but I need you to know that I love you with every last piece of me. If nothing else, please believe that.

To this day, I still don't believe you left willingly or on your own accord. That doesn't change the fact that I'm the only one. I've been met with denial and pushback at every turn. While I'll never give up on believing in you, I needed to stop. I needed to put myself first. While chasing your ghost, I became one myself. Pieces of me died while I grasped on to whatever parts of you I could reach. I lost myself to our past, to the best of us. Despite all of my efforts to hold the weight of the world if it meant there was even the slightest chance of you coming back to me, it crumbled around me anyways.

So, my love, this isn't a goodbye. I will never say goodbye to you. Regardless of if I get to see your face and hold you again, you will always be the most important person in my life. Everything I do will be for you and because of you. There's not a day that will go by that I won't think of you and the joy you brought to my life.

For now, though, that's all I have to offer. No more fighting for answers, demanding explanations, or challenging what people think they know. For now, I'll just learn to accept this new reality I've been forced into. You were always the more outspoken between the two us, anyways, and without you here, finding my voice seems like a monumental task a lot of the time.

Wherever you may are, I know we'll meet again, be it in this world or the next. I'm sorry that I can't give you more than that, but I simply have nothing else left to give, other than my love and devotion to you, my dearest, loveliest Theo.

With eternal love and endlessly yours,

Melody