Only The Death Of Me

“Doomsday is close at hand

I'll book the marching band

To play as you speak

I'll feel like throwing up

You' sit and stare like

A goddamn machine

I'd like to plan out my part in this, but

you're such a narcissist

You'll probably do it next week

I don't get a choice in the matter, why

would l?

It's only the death of me”


My friend played this song once. One time. And ever since it’s been the same chorus over and over and over again. A constant loop of music playing repeatedly in my mind. It doesn’t go away. It’s all I hear from when I wake up and until I go to bed. I’ve tried everything to get rid of it. Distracting myself, listening to other songs, and trying so hard to tune it out, that I’ve reached a point of exhaustion.


I gave up until someone told me that listening to the song can help you get it out of your head. Something about hearing it out loud, stops it from playing inside. So I decided to try it.


I was already late for work so I got in my car and planned to play the song. I wasn’t going to do it because, looking for it and starting the song would waste more time than I had. But I was desperate. It took about 30 seconds to start the song. Not a lot of time, but to me that was ages.


I started to drive away and begin to listen to the song i know so well because of its repetition inside my brain. I finally reached an intersection. I was just about to miss the light, when two cars in front of me were able to get through. I started to scold myself, if I had just decided to leave instead of find the song I hate more than anything in the world, I would’ve made that light.


Just then a car speeds through the intersection blowing its red light and smashing into the first car, and the second car smashing into the chaos immediately after. All passengers died.


Just 30 seconds wasted saved me from meeting that fate. If I had left right away, If I hadn’t played that terrible song, I would be dead. Maybe it was fate. A song I’d heard once played in my head so I would spend the time to find it and play it out loud. A song saved my life. It’s not that dramatic is it? I mean it’s only the death of me.


“Doomsday is close at hand

I'll book the marching band

To play as you speak

I'll feel like throwing up

You' sit and stare like

A goddamn machine

I'd like to plan out my part in this, but

you're such a narcissist

You'll probably do it next week

I don't get a choice in the matter, why

would l?

It's only the death of me”

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