STORY STARTER
You slide the bag across the table, the hooded figure opposite you peers inside. "Where the hell did you find this?!"
Continue this dialogue.
STORY STARTER
You slide the bag across the table, the hooded figure opposite you peers inside. "Where the hell did you find this?!"
Continue this dialogue.
Thank you for the advice, I definitely need to work on conveying the imagery in my head a little better and dialogue is definitely not my strong suit
The premise of the artefact is intriguing and it would have been good to know more about it.
The dialogue I think needs some attending to. It reads as though your characters are cockney lads from London but the mention of Golgorn and horses as transport suggest a fantasy setting.
Also, the fact that everyone notices the chair being scraped back, but not a character revealing they are a walking skeleton was a bit confusing. It didn’t seem like they were aside enough for the skeleton to not be seen.