Peter is jostled awake by shake of his shoulder and someone softly saying, “Niccolo, you must arise. They’re expecting you.”

Confused at the name he’s called, Peter opens his eyes and swears he’s still dreaming. He sees a woman in front of him with a weird smock sort of shirt on with some tights and boots. He’s immediately reminded of Robin Hood. Wait, was that actually a man?

“Is something wrong Nic?” the woman asks in a deeper voice than Peter expected. Definitely a man.

“Where am I?” Peter asks Robin Hood.

Robin Hood looks at Peter with a very concerned look and hesitantly responds, “We’re at the theater around the corner from the cathedral. You’re about to go give a lecture to thousands of people about what the meaning of life is.”

“I’m … doing what?” Peter takes several long blinks and slaps his face a few times. He can’t wake himself up from this dream, which is turning into a nightmare. He’s a CPA from Chicago. What did he know about the meaning of life?

“I knew that last glass of wine wasn’t a good idea, but you always seem to pull it together in the end,” Robin Hood says as he grabs a cup of water and splashes it on Peter’s face.

Peter scrambles out of the chair he was dozing in and only then does he realize that he’s in what is essentially a dress. The blood drains from his face. He makes a move to start running from the room, but he trips over his own feet as he’s wearing shoes that are not only insanely uncomfortable, but they also have heels. Robin Hood grabs his arm and helps him up. “Nic, that’s enough. We have to go on stage. Let’s go.”

Robin Hood drags Peter out the door, through a hallway, and they arrive in the wings of a stage, in front of what he can only imagine are thousands of people who are here to hear someone, who is not Peter, give an enlightening speech about life.

“Remember Nic, you need to project as much as possible. There are lots of people here to listen to your words.” Robin Hood leaves Peter standing there, legs shaking, while he walks up on stage to lots of polite clapping.

“Thank you everyone for your presence today! I’m here to introduce you to one of the most enlightened minds of our time. He’s truly brilliant and has some pretty revolutionary ideas to share with you all today. Please welcome to this stage, Niccolo Machiavelli!” Robinhood turns toward Peter and waves him on stage.

Machiavelli? The only thing that Peter could associate with Machiavelli in his mind are negative vibes. He was a bad dude, wasn’t he? No time to dwell on that as his feet are carrying him up on stage.

Peter gets to center stage, looks out at all the people wearing silly outfits, and takes a deep breath. Time to tell them what he knows about life. None of these people have seen Forrest Gump. “Life is like a box of chocolates.”