Carlos' anxiety went through the roof when he saw the strange professor in front of him. He knew it wouldn't be his usual professor but facing the reality made his stomach heavy and his Caucasian skin burst into hot sweats.

'Carlos Rodrigues?' the middle-aged lady asked while writing on her notebook.

'Yes, mam.'

'I'm Anette Ferguson, and I will be assessing your oral dissertation.'

'Very well...' Carlos said, hands shaking.

'First things first. What is the topic about?'

'Well...' he took a deep breath and swallowed hard. 'It's about how foreign expressions and idioms can enrich English.'

She raised her eyebrows above her thing glasses.

'Interesting. You can start whenever you feel ready.'

'Thank you, Professor Ferguson.'

Carlos cleared his voice. He was not allowed any notes at all, so he tried to think about his speech for a few moments. Before he could stop himself, the question came out of his mouth.

'Would you say your neighbour's chicken is better than yours?'

Professor Ferguson frowned, confused while Carlos mentally swore at himself for being such an idiot.

'What do you mean, Carlos?'

'Please excuse me, professor. I am nervous. In Portugal, my country, when we say that our neighbour's chicken is better than ours. it means we always feel that other people's lives are better.'

'The same as the grass is always greener on the other side of the fence, right?'

'Correct... I have picked a few idioms that I believe would be interesting when literally translated to English.'

'Please go on.'

'This is not worth the tip of a horn... This idiom means something is not worth a grain of salt.'

She smiled.

'Now that is a funny one, I'll even write it down and use it.'

Carlos stopped to look at her as she wrote. What a terrible start, could she really be amused?

'What more idioms do you have, Carlos?'

'Ahem... Burnt cat is afraid of cold water.... And, and, and... well, there is one I find hilarious but it may be too rude to use here.'

He blushed but Prof. Ferguson grinned, visibly interested.

'Never mind that, you can say it.'

'When the Portuguese say that something stays in... well... something stay's in... in Judas' ass, it means...'

He stared at his own feet, shaking, but Prof. Ferguson laughed and encouraged him to carry on.

'How interesting. What does it mean in your country when people say something stays in Judas'... well, in Judas' ass?'

Carlos let out an unvoluntary laugh.

'It means it's very far away. The Brazilians have a similar one. They say it stays where Judas lost his boots. We, Portuguese, are ruder.' he tried to be funny. 'How do we say in English? Off the beaten-track?'

Prof. Ferguson burst into laughter as well. So much so, she had to take her glasses off to wipe the tears from her eyes.

'Hahaha, I see now what you mean. That's a funny one. Judas' ass. That's hilarious.'

Carlos blushed further and carried on with his idioms. For some reason he believed it had not gone too badly even if the whole thing seemed like a comedy.

He didn't find out about his score before the following month. But right before he walked into the room where his regular professor was with his certificate, he heard a few girls giggle outside.

'Where the heck did you get that from, Melissa?'

'Hahaha, it was Prof. Ferguson who told me. I don't feel like visiting this new mall because it stays in Judas' ass.'