“Come on, we’re almost at the top!”

“No we ain’t! The map says ‘The Sorcerer’s Bridge’ is two kilometres away from the peak, and that’s where we’re at!”

I rolled my eyes at my friends’ bickering.

“Marlin, your map’s from a hundred years ago! It’s useless!”

“Don’t take it out on the map, Miss Taking-our-phones-along-will-kill-the-hiking-vibes!!!!”

Rhonda harrumphed. She stomped away from Marlin, and my eyes widened. In two long strides, I reached her and yanked her wrist.

She let out a small yelp as she looked at the sheer drop below.

“Th-thanks, Pat.” She smiled wanly.

“Anytime.” I grinned. My friends looked terrified, staying ten feet away from the edge.

“I think it’s best that we stop for tonight, unless we want one of us to get smashed to smithereens by the end of the hour. There’s plenty of dry caves around here. Tomorrow, we’ll either find a way outta here or turn around. Plus, we get to talk about the merit of Marlo’s map.” I probed around and found a dry, roomy cave.

“This’ll do!” I yelled. No response. I peaked over my shoulder to find nobody in my vicinity. I groaned.

“Guys, not funny! It’s been a long, tiring day, and I’m not in the mood for tricks! Now get here this instant, or I’ll push you both off this ah!” I finished with a shriek, as I felt cold, rough hands grip my ankles and tug me backward. I tried to scream, when a lined palm covered my mouth.

“Patricia!” I whipped around, and saw my friends staring back at me. They’d both been pinioned against the wall by two figures that stayed in the shadows. The cave was by far the biggest of any I’d ever seen. The walls had strange symbols carved over them, and torch brackets were nailed into stone. In spite of my terror, I was intrigued.

“Will these ‘uns do?” A raspy voice sounded.

“Perfectly.” Another one replied, sounding scarily delighted.

Immediately, my friends and I were thrown down on the ground in front of us. We looked at each other, horror-struck. Suddenly we heard cackling from all around us. The torches in the brackets were lit, sending each little feature of the cave into sharp relief. Including our kidnappers.

Warts, hats and flowing robes. That’s all we could see all around us, but it was enough. Enough to tell us we were in the presence of...

“Witches.” Marlin whispered, and the cackling eddied.

“Sisterhood of the ‘Warkamha Witches’!” A loud, guttural voice thundered across the cave. “A blessing has been bestowed upon our humble coven this fine night. ‘Tis three young humans who’ve wandered into our lair!” The cackling started again. “But we’ll have to eat Butch here. Pity too, he’s a pretty one.” Marlin gulped as one of the witches dragged her talon under his chin.

“At least he’ll have some meat on him.” More cackling, but there was something different. Their voices sounded... normal, now. I frowned. My friends had noticed too.

In fact, apart from their appearances, they seemed pretty average.

“Excuse me... witches?” Rhonda asked nervously. All sixteen witches looked up at once. “If you don’t mind me asking, what exactly do you mean by initiation?”

“Well, we’ll perform some ancient rituals, call upon the devil, anoint you with the blood of your male buddy, after which we’ll feast on his corpse and what-not. It’s really quite an elaborate process. Tiresome sometimes, but sadly witches are bound by the ancient laws.” And the witch sighed so deeply, that I would’ve felt very sorry for her if she hadn’t just described, in very gory detail, how she would murder my friend.

“Wait a minute.” Rhonda frowned. “You’re no witches. That’s not how initiation works. There’s a lot more brutality, but it’s quite simple. Good ol’ gore.”

The witches grins faltered. Once again, they sighed.

“Damn. I told you we should have sprung for the expensive costumes, Martha.”

They turned to us. The leader spoke. “The proverbial game is clearly up. We’re a bunch of phonies. We have a YouTube channel. We’ve tried to start pranking people. Hopefully that’ll coast us over to two-hundred subscriptions!”

We left after the astonishing revelation and a promise to subscribe. Right as we settled for the night, Marlin turned to Rhonda.

“Hey Ronnie?”

“Yeah Marlo?”

“How come you knew so much about covens and witches?”