I look at the photographs of us

And see your features

Etched into my DNA.

The way my face

Resembles yours

Makes my heart sink

Because I know

That these photographs

Are the closest I’ll ever be

To seeing your face again.

I want to tear them apart

So I don’t have to think of you

But I can’t bring myself to do it.

I just stare with empty eyes

Waiting for you to reanimate

From a faded Polaroid

Like my tears could flood life

Back into the ashes that remain of you.

Your smile was contagious

But our sadness is genetic

And now I can’t move on

Even after seven years.

I don’t forgive you

For leaving me so soon

And I’ll never forget

The way your face looked

On that night

So cold and so lifeless

While you writhed in my arms

And I let the light fade

Because I didn’t know

How to live a life

Much less how to save one

And as they laid you on that stretcher

With that metallic device

Attempting to pump life through

Your already dead heart

I felt a piece of me slip away

A piece I’ll never get back.