My partner and I had relationship problems in our marriage like all marriages they all have their ups and downs, but this one was more serious as she wasn’t an alcoholic

She always felt the touch from the parents as they both divorced. One of them died and felt miserable all our life.

Then decided to join alcohol self-help group house in alocal place place

One day, I noticed that she was withdrawn she was spending more time at that meeting self-help group

I thought this was a symptom of the treatment as I noticed that she was not drinking too much alcohol as before

Later I felt that maybe she was busy. She met somebody there and was having an affair.

Said that the group was full of like-minded people with similar experiences and problems and she enjoyed the group a lot

One day when we asked for romantic meal and she said she had to join the group that was the last rule at this point not a self-help group or self-help group that was masquerading as a cult

This self-help group was really a cult

She described how self-help group had released her from her sins and that she had told everything about our relationship that she was abusive. She was beating up her parents and the only way she could release herself and find her inner welbeing was to remove herself from the source which was a family and friends and me. She was living to other people’s expectations.

She said that the group said that the criticism that she received from a parents made her weak and that she was treated like a doormat people pleaser and that is why she said alcoholism to better be able to assert her self.

I replied that’s not true she was the assertive even when she was not an alcoholic. Yes she threw plates and things and when she got angry but she already had the assertive personality type that why I loved her and married her . I was the weak one.

Criticism, she said made people weak willed It created a generation of people who behaved not themselves but like an abusive needy child.

I agree that criticism was bad but without criticism you can’t really improve

She said over criticism turns people into abusive needy people who don’t act naturally and that makes them losers in life? They do things to compensate for it.

If nobody pushed criticise, you couldn’t be a bit of person. I said you wouldn’t have gone to university or college or achieve thinks that she’s achieved in life and she would not have met me.

Eventually, I said I will go to have my little romantic meal by myself.

Criticism, nobody likes it’s horrible but it doesn’t make people weak. Constructive criticism can make people better.

Nobody likes to hear that we are wrong in life, but sometimes we have to told what we are doing is not wrong in life

People can sometimes be critical and get that wrong maybe what the criticising doesn’t matter but we can choose to take it seriously seriously or leave it

after that I shut the door