I was a good person. I always made sure my conscience was clean at the end of the day. So why am I standing at the gates of hell?

I thought hell was just a firey pit that you fell into, but yet here I am standing in front of the most beautiful golden metal gate made up of intricately woven metal vines. In the middle, a gold plate with “Welcome to Hell” etched in cursive, and below that, an opal door bell. A freakin door bell?!

This can’t be right. Panic starts to set in as I turn to leave, only to realize that I can’t. I can’t move. I’m surrounded by blackness. An invisible wall on all sides, except for this disturbingly enchanting gate. There’s only one option.

I can feel my heart beating in my throat, my eyes stinging with tears, head pounding with panic and confusion. This has to be a mistake, there has to be a way to fix this. I’m not supposed to be here. Diiiiinnnnngggg dooooonnngg. My whole body vibrates with the sound and right on cue, the gate opens.

As I step across the threshold, my eyes adjust to the over head lights. What the hell is this place? As I look around, I realize I’m in some sort of waiting room. Ahead of me is a reception desk. The room is empty. No windows, no doors, no pictures, no people. Just rows of empty chairs, and the empty desk with a bell sitting on top. What kind of mind fuckery is this? I walk up to the desk and call out.

“Excuse me, there’s been a mistake. I must’ve made a wrong turn. I’m not supposed to be here.” Nothing. “Hello, how do I get out of here? Who do I talk to?” Yet again, I’m met with silence. I can feel a second wave of panic set in as I reach out and ring the bell. I jump as it echos through out the empty room. Then suddenly I hear a voice, seemingly from nowhere. “Please be seated and someone will be with you shortly.”

As I take my seat, a slide show of sorts starts playing on the empty wall at the front of the room. Pictures of big giants mansions, exotic cars, beautiful parks, restaurants, amusement parks, libraries. Families settled around dinning room tables. Couples walking hand in hand down tree lined streets, smiling lovingly at each other. It’s like a brochure for a gated community. How can THIS be hell? Where’s the tourcher and torment? Where’s the pain and suffering?

“Like what you see?” Every hair on the back of my neck stands up as I jump and let out a screech. I turn towards my right and see a tall slender man sitting in the chair next to me. Where did he come from? “I…no, I’m just trying to get out of here.” I notice the man has a name tag…Jonas- concierge. “Well that’s a pity, we have a lot to offer down here.” Jonas replies. “Why would anybody CHOOSE to stay here?!” I ask. Jonas chuckes. “Well most people don’t get to choose. But it seems that YOU, Tilly, have been given a rare opportunity, doesn’t it?

“An opportunity to what?! Spend the rest of eternity living amongst the most vile, evil creatures on earth?! You want me to CHOOSE to bump elbows with murders and rapist?!” Jonas smiles, “Oh no, we have a special place for them down here. It’s like prison, but worse. They get to spend eternity experiencing exactly what they’ve done to other’s , over and over again. But your forgetting, my dear, that there are different levels of sin. Do you think it’s fair that the man who embezzled money from his boss in order to keep a roof over his head experience the same torture as the man who raped and killed a child?”

I’ve never thought about it like that. “Well what happens to those people then, the embezzlers of the world?” “Well you see,” Jonas crosses his legs and rest his hand casually in his lap,” some just come down here and continue on with their life as if nothings ever happened, they just spend eternity doing what they’ve always done. And some…well they use this as a second chance. To try and do things right this time.”

“Wait, so your telling me that even AFTER you’ve died and gone to hell, you still have a chance to get to heaven? Like a second life? But what happens if they mess up? If they keep sinning? Where do they go then?” I asked. Jonas sat up straight,giving me a quizzical look. “Is there such thing as “sin” after death?” He asked.

As Jonas stood up from his chair, he continued. “You’d be surprised at how easy it is to live a full, truly happy life once you remove the pressure of “sin” from the equation. And if you do make “sinful” choices, well your already dead…and in hell…so does it really matter?” Jonas started back twards the gate and motioned for me to follow. I stood up from my chair, my head spinning with questions, and followed him. “Down here, ”he continued, “there’s no promise of eternal life. Your already in eternity. There’s no threat of firey hell, because your already IN hell. There’s just you living your afterlife the way YOU want to. You can choose to start over and try again as many times as you want. Hell, you can start over living a new life every week if you wanted to.”

We stopped just outside the gate. That beautiful golden, intricate archway…just inches from my freedom. I can’t help but think of all the things I wanted to do with my life, all the choice that I made. All the things that lead me here, if only I had made a different choice. If I had said yes when I said no. If I had pushed through my fears and doubts. If I hadn’t always played it safe…..

We turn to look at each other. Jonas stares down at me, a knowing look in his eyes. The gates open into that same blackness that I came from. “Well my dear,” Jonas says as he gestured twards the darkness,”off you go.” I step forward ready to leave, my mind still racing. Just before I cross the threshold, I turn to look back and see Jonas walking away. “Jonas…wait….”