As I’m about to be laid to rest

There’s a tale I need to get off my chest

I’ve tried to live my life as a reflection of gods wisdom

Scared of losing teeth, just wanted all the winnings, call them my Elysian visions

Looking back on my past

It’s clear that time flies fast

But there won’t be a flag at half mast

Forgive me father, at long last

I need to repent about a sin, will leave you aghast

Didn’t grow up with much capital

Punishments were handed out like candy, it was casual

Surrounded by violence at every street corner

Every family I knew had the number of the coroner

So I started to slang bricks, out of the back of my off white whip

The environment was filled with ruckus

So I kept a piece, chamber loaded, fuck a safety, guided by my own moral compass

Soon my vision became blurry

Dead presidents piled up in a hurry

Knew I needed to get out,

Or I’d end up in cuffs in front of a jury

Made enemies, was just one price to pay of many

One fateful night, got into it with a dealer called big Jay, we had some words to say

Blows exchanged over turf became heated

Didn’t like the stabs coming my way, wasn’t gonna leave them untreated

The stage had been set, glow of the moon was the spotlight

Get your popcorn, crowd gathered to watch, like a prize fight

I thought I was done with the game

My ego didn’t feel the same

Felt like I needed imaginary gain

So I chose this path, one way lane

Squared up, fists start flying like the mad hatter

Blind rage, see red, bang! No more chatter,

Blood splatter, brain matter littered the street, like rats, the crowd scattered

Standing there with the gun still smoking

Hoping I wasn’t seen, situation felt like a fever dream

Shit just got real, killed a man, steel gun steal life don’t know how to feel

Body numb, knew if I got caught I was done

So I ditched the gun and started to run

My whole life until now, I lay here dying, my time has come

Years have gone by, never been caught

Image of the carcass still seared in my mind, call it a black thought

The center can no longer hold, things fall apart

When I get to heaven that’ll be a new start

Family is gathered round, ignorant that I used that caliber

Instead my verdict is sealed, God saw the massacre

Today is judgement day, Yom Kippur on the calendar

Pushing up daisies now, I think I smell lavender

Right at the moment of peace, the smell changes to rotting flounder

I committed an unforgivable sin, the blast was eternal blasphemy

I thought I could undo the past, logical fallacy

The present presence is the angel of death, I’m going to it’s galaxy

No legacy, infinite hell is my reality