It’s afternoon and I return to my bench, grab some popcorn that these movie lovers always seem to drop (thanks for littering folks!) and watch all the married couples do there walk.

Now I’m sure you’re asking yourself:

Why is a 4 year old interested in people watching?

See? The thing about marriage is that they tend to argue. Over stupid things too! Like who took out the trash? Why are you stressing me out over laundry? Where’s the money going? 

_Like, honestly. They’re people who wish to have the life you’re living. Stop arguing and appreciate what you have! _

But I do apologize. It just gets me so heated , ya know? Granted if they never argued, I would never have the privilege of watching my “show”, thus depriving me of the little entertainment I have.

You must understand that I have always had an active imagination. The snake tail I mentioned before? Is no exception. 

My “stages” start (which I made up myself. I know. It’s brilliant.).

Here’s the rundown:

Man and woman begin argument (obviously).

Then we have stage 1. 

black smoke rise from the aggressors feet, like small wisps inflating into covering the aggressor, completely.

_Oh no… gasp!_

As I’m eating my stale, tasteless popcorn I watch In anticipation for The next stage: 

The boom.

The breathing smoke begins to tighten, like inflating a balloon, then…(pause for dramatic effect)…burst! An explosion of flames and light, leaving no scent, but the heat is like baking under the sun. 

Sometimes I take out a pair of old sunglasses and roast my popcorn.

It doesn’t work. It’s just fun.

The aggressor? Is perfectly safe (ironically) as he (Let’s assume) swirls into a proud red-skinned wolf. 

(This is my favorite part!)

The finale? Is “The Break”.

The wolf gets so angry. Howl and claw at his wife, hurting her until she cries.

But this isn’t just any simple cry:

She literally cries herself into a literal ocean! She becomes the ocean!

Her body, quite literally “breaks down”. It is both beautiful and terrifying.

The ocean glides over the flaming wolf, washing the flames from the wolf’s fur as it bleeds away:

The wolf no longer aflame. It is now pure and white. It cries a single, powerful, yet mournful tune as the man returns.

The ocean returns to being what it once was. The woman.

Then finally? As I’m crying from this emotional rollercoaster, The end of my show is quite simple. 

They embrace and, usually the guy, says:

_I’m sorry._

A beautiful end to a wonderful argument.

You know, I have had moments where I truly believe it was real. But then I realize it was just a very heated argument that my brain had fun changing.

For I blink and that whole cinematic experience I just described? Is gone.

Thus confirming what I thought. But why does that one moment remain?

The embrace.

Once they detach themselves, they continue walking as if nothing happened.

_I’m not completely crazy._

Little did I realize at the time that these stages—the musings of a 4 year old boy—would come back to haunt me. 

But that won’t be until my next hunt. I’m giving enough spoilers as it is!

You’re more than welcome to join me but:

Let’s focus on the present, shall we?