” it has been on charge all year and the bloody sat nav has now stopped working ” bellowed santa

” you have had that one for centuries, it's of no surprise so you should have gone to speck savers and got your glasses replaced ” snarled an impatient reindeer

” I was going to buy you one for Christmas ” smiled an elf in santas defence.

” stop all the bitching reindeer if you are wanting one of Mrs clauses mince pies” snapped santa

A fairy now joined the down on his luck santa and advised if wanting to apply for a Christmas wish that he would need to deliver to fairy town first and also include a year's worth of Mrs Clauses mince pies.

Santa accepted and as he then wished for the rest of the day to go right,

The trouble making sat nav suddenly sprang back to life and so everyone's presents we're delivered on time.

And as the day went on

Santa and his crew happily fulfilled their once a year mission .

Whilst taking a rest in the north pole ,

Santa delved into the emergency supply box for to a well earned glass of sherry .

After a few sips he was soon pouring his heart out to who ever would listen.

Forgetting that fairys had radar ears.

Then after a few more sherrys Santa whispered to head elf that fairy had dealt a hard bargain

fairy pointed her wand his way and replied a deal is a deal.

Mrs clause heard it all on the intercom and did agree with her husband but because it was Christmas she wanted to keep the piece between santa and all of his helpers so she went ahead and invited every one to get their arses round for a glass or two of sherry .

” Now that's what I call a deal ” smiled fairy.

Santa, fairy and elf now instructed reindeer to take them home.

” your not really bitch ” beamed santa

Reindeer fluttered her long eye lashes from her large bambi looking eyes and bellowed

” let's forget your fuck up Santa as it has after all turned into a great day”

Santa laughed all the way home because it had been a good Christmas indeed