I met him last year on the week of Nicky G.’s birthday. At first, I thought nothing of him... He came from a family who was infamous for time travelling and causing time paradoxes for laughs. The whole family was at Nicky G.’s birthday party and stayed until the start of 2020 (and then they departed, ready to travel to another different time period to cause even MORE time paradoxes)... Or at least, we thought that we got rid of them...

Only a day after their departure, I found him sitting in the living room, casually sipping a cup of tea with the TV off. Confused, I gave him a light tap on the shoulder. In response to my touch, the otherworldly man nearly jumped right out of his blue skin and dropped his cup of tea on the couch in fright!

“A-agh! D-don’t scare me like that! You nearly gave me a bloody heart attack!” He yelled as he looked over to me with a bewildered look on his face.

“Sorry.” I said unapologetically.

“Why are you still here?” I asked him with a annoyed tone of voice.

“A-ah... Er... W-w-well...” The man stammered, clearly still shook up from earlier.

“Out! We don’t need two of you time-obsessed weirdos in here! One of you is ENOUGH!” I bellowed, trying my best to sound intimidating.

The man didn’t move, but he did cast me a rather odd look before he stood up and started walking upstairs... INTO MY BEDROOM!?

I marched up after him, ready to give him a piece of my mind. When I opened the door, he lay on my bed, with a... Questionable look on his face...

“Oi, this is MY room! Get out before I... B-before I... E-erugh... J-JUST GET OUT!”

“Ah, but this is such a lovely room... I must admit, you’re a brilliant artist, Ripple... Both the colours and the aesthetics in this room are very pleasing to one’s eyes... Especially mine...” He responded calmly, his English accent becoming particularly notable.

“Flattery doesn’t work on me, Nef! Why are you still here?!” I persisted with the question, hoping that he would either just leave or tell me why the hell he was still there.

“My, aren’t we getting a little ahead of the times, Ripple? Remember that there’s no time like the present!”

“THAT’S NOT EVEN AN ANSWER, AND PLEASE... STOP WITH THE TIME PUNS!” I had lost my patience with the man and just screeched into his face, hoping that would help me get my point across.

Nef chuckled for a moment before staring at me once again, this time with a somewhat crazed look in his eyes. This could’ve been my imagination, but I could’ve swore time had stopped in that very moment...

“Finally... After spending so much time waiting... They’re away... My family... That awful, abusive and nefarious family of mine... I NEVER HAVE TO SEE THEM AGAIN! F-furthermore... You and I... We’re... Alone... No sign of that red-headed toilet roll or that bloody green pencil of a man...”

I simply just stood there in shock... What the hell is this guy rambling about?

He took a deep and heavy breath before continuing...

“I never thought this day would come... The day that we would be... Free... Free from all restrictions and all forms of repression... You and I... We were... Destined to be together... It was meant to be...”

I struggled to think of a response to this, but his delusional words sounded like total gibberish to me...

“Do you know how many years I’ve been watching you...? I’ve been carefully examining your every move... I know what you like... W-what you look for in a partner... I’ve seen all of your past relationships and how they all failed... I’ve seen every aspect of your life... And... I’ve came to the conclusion that... I think I would make the perfect soulmate for you...”

My jaw dropped as I listened to Nef’s insane, delusional and deranged rambling. I just could NOT believe what I was hearing! I wanted to believe that this was just a nightmare.

But unfortunately...

It wasn’t.

By this point, Nef’s face had distrorted into a demented, twisted grin and he was breathing so heavily, I nearly thought he was going to pass out... The man was being increasingly more unhinged the more he spoke of his affection... Or rather, his OBSESSION towards me...