“I don’t know what is more disturbing that there are yeti erotic romance novels or that the best rated one is using ratings from Great Expectations to boost its ratings or that an actual human gave Dickens three stars for being ‘dated,’” Robb said.

“Why do you allow yourself to fall into these rabbit holes? Honestly read a book, take up a hobby, something anything else dude,” Dorcas answered.

“So what earth shattering shenanigans are you up to?”

Dorcas chuckled.

“Come on Dorie, give.”

“I’m doing an online quiz, Do You Need A Cat or A Boyfriend? Apparently I’m in desperate need of a Maine Coon,” Dorcas said. She sighed. The sound of a beer bottle being open in the background.

Robb was quiet. Then he laughed with false brightness. “Is this a roundabout way of getting me back?”

Dorcas took a long swallow. She clicked on pet finder.com and swiped through a handful of ginger toms.

“Should I play hard to get? Take some hints from Frosty Alpha Fake Fiancé,” Robb asked. He jiggled the ice in his whiskey glass.

“Robby, no. You promised.”

Robb rearranged his Amazon cart. Softly his keyboard clicked. Then he banged his fist against his laptop.

“You know I’m terrible at keeping my word, babe.”

“Not funny. We’re back in the friend zone. We break up to make up. We don’t work as a couple.”

A town apart, the two sat together in dimmed rooms lit by monitors.

“You hungry?” Dorcas asked.

“I’m ahead of you. I DoorDashed you tofu with veggies with spring rolls,” Robb said.

“I sent you a sack of White Castle and gifted you a kindle of Frosty Embrace: Yeti’s Romantic Revenge. Maybe you can get some tips.”

Over stir fry and steamed buns, Robb reads to Dorcas the secrets of monster shifter love.