The strenuous start of the day accumulates my whole body with dread. My eye lids push their way open giving my eyes a few short moments to accustom to the intense brightness of the day. Even though, my room is much darker than you would expect for a summer’s morning.

I would say that when finally fully awake, I begin to realise what the day marks. But I never sleep deep enough to have any control over my subconscious mind, my thoughts are already consumed. Full.

The thoughts in my head turn to mush. Watered down liquid. I always imagin that if my forehead was a window, you would see them spilling over leaving my brain to drown. Empty.

I turn towards my right and a cold, blank vacancy absorbs my vision. Who knew your heart could not only break once, but continue to shatter a thousand times, every day.

Time stretches for miles, as though the End will never come, untouchable. Yet, as I see the seconds tick by they forever stay stuck. Giving me a thousand nights in one day. But the End was so close once and has take everything away. He plummets his hands into your chest and doesn’t care if he breaks a rib or two. He claws to find your organ of essence and pierces the flesh with a lasting wound that cannot be healed. He clenches onto the pulsing tissue and rips it from its cage. The raw moment agonising every second that is to come and I surrender in compliance.

For my heart shatters a thousand times each day I’m not with him.