I feel

Backwards

Like my brain was stitched with two left hands

And my heart with sharp wire instead of gentle thread

I feel odd

Like I’m made wrong

A unique creature to gaze upon

Not with beauty but with horror

I feel broken

Not that I was ever shattered

But I was made this way

Undone and unfixable

I feel terrifying

Like a beast hiding in the dark corners

Begging you to run

Before I destroy both you and myself

I feel mismatched

The darkness of my eyes do not match the brightness of my smile

And I don’t know what’s worse

Everyone noticing or no one noticing at all

I feel as if I’m running in the wrong direction

Wrong path

Wrong place

Wrong me

I feel like a mistake

A smear of acrylic on a once beautiful canvas

A burden to be erased

And not loved

I was made backwards

Therefore I am backwards

And there is no fixing me

Now that I am here