A/N: If you couldn’t tell by the title, this piece was loosely based off of the song ‘I hate u, I love u’ by Gnash with Olivia O’Brien. I’m not very good at writing sad stuff, but I hope you like it!

Brandon never thought he’d be back here.

He was sitting on a large rock that served as a bridge that went over a small stream, though only no one ever came here.

Well, except Brandon and one other person.

He missed her, his best friend, Lola. But he couldn’t go see her. Not after what had happened between them.

When Lola and Brandon first became friends, they vowed that they would never fall in love with each other. That obviously didn’t go the way they’d hoped. Brandon just had to go and mess it up by letting his true feelings slip. Though Lola felt the same, she said that she couldn’t be with him and had ignored the countless messages and phone calls Brandon had left her.

Brandon was snapped out of his thoughts when a voice spoke to him, a quiet “hey.”

Brandon looked up and saw Lola. She had on a jacket that was too big on her, the front of her hair pulled back by her signature butterfly clips, letting the rest of her frizzy curly hair loose and free behind her.

After not speaking to her for almost a year, she still looked the same.

Brandon looked away from her,

“You shouldn’t be here.” He told her.

Lola sighed as she sat next to him,

“I know.” She said.

They were silent for a while before Lola spoke again,

“Brandon, do you regret this?” She asked.

Brandon looked in her direction, but didn’t meet her eyes.

“I won’t lie.” He said, “I want to hate you, I really do, but I just can’t. I miss you, I miss sitting here with you at midnight drinking soda cans that we stole from that old gas station, I miss passing notes to you in class, I miss ditching school with you for no good reason, only because we are young and stupid and have our whole lives ahead of us, I miss it all, Lola.”

Brandon finally met her eyes. Lola’s eyes were brimmed with tears that she refused to let out.

Lola turned to look back at the horizon and the setting sun,

“You don’t think I miss it either?” She asked,

“I messed up and got too attached to you Brandon, I told myself I wouldn’t fall for you, and yet I did.”

Brandon longed to reach out and put his hand on her shoulder, but he refrained from doing so as he said,

“Why don’t we just try, you know, being a couple?”

Lola smiled sadly,

“You know we can’t.”

Emotions that Brandon hadn’t felt in that almost year were now starting to surface again.

“Why not?” He asked a little desperately.

“Because Brandon, you deserve someone who will be by your side, someone who will always put you first and recognize your bad and good days. I honestly can’t guarantee that I can be that person for you.” Lola answered.

Brandon just now noticed the bag that Lola had with her.

“Are you planning on running away?” He asked.

She nodded,

“I can’t be here anymore...”

“Lola you don’t have to run, we can figure this out, just please stay.”

Lola shook her head,

“What do you want from me Brandon? I’m a cowered and I believe that anybody l, especially you, could actually love me, like mother like daughter I guess.” She laughed pathetically.

Lola stood up from the rock,

“I came to say goodbye.”

Brandon wanted to stop her, he really did. But he just couldn’t, that’s what he gets for opening his heart, he supposed.

Knowing that Brandon wasn’t going to look at her again, Lola sighed,

“Just... I just hope you find happiness Brandon, and I’m sorry I couldn’t give that to you.”

As Lola walked out of his life for the second time, Brandon finally let the tears he had been holding fall.