(soooo this was posted earlier but since it's from my WIP i thought i'd show you the extended version)

"Casper Ezell, wake **up**-!" I shout desperately, clutching his unmoving body.

**_Fuck_**. There's so much blood; it sends waves of sheer panic down my spine. I don't even know whose blood surrounds us anymore. The searing pain in my stomach hasn't ceased, but this boy is way more important. He's dying, for Christ's sake. How ironic, dying the same way his god did. A bitter laugh escapes me before I choke up.

"_please_.." My begging voice floats uselessly through the air, with no ears to receive the words. Nobody is here to listen in the dead of night. No god, nor human, is present.

My forehead rests against his as I stifle a sob. I press my hand to his side, trying to keep in what's left of his blood. There's not much, and I know somewhere in my heart that there's nothing more I can do.

"I will not walk this earth without you, Cas.. Just wake up. I know it hurts.. just open your eyes." Tears of mine drip onto his dirty, pale face as my shaky cries resound back to my own ears.

"I'm sorry.. I'm so sorry.." I mumble over and over, as if that can change what happened; as if it could erase the past day from existence. What did this poor boy do to deserve this? It's not his fault at all. But that begs the question:

Who _is_ to blame?

I want to blame myself, just so I'd have something tangible to destroy, to hurt. I want to blame myself so maybe I wouldn't have to face the fact that I wouldn't have been able to save him in any other reality. This cursed multiverse of agony was doomed the second we made eye contact in that bar.

Maybe, just maybe, if I had never approached him then he'd have never been dragged into this mess; the nightmares, Avila's death...

My lips part to let out a scream, loud and broken, and I'm left listening to the way it echoes back in the cold emptiness of the woods. I'm completely, hopelessly alone.

Cradling the limp corpse of what could've been a bright future in my arms, my own body gives out and joins his in the dirt.