Cramp Zapper

Behold, fellow Mooninites!

An object like one never seen before... something that can cure your deepest aches and ailments with just one simple application! Formerly known as the “heating pad”, we’ve obtained this gadget from Earth and renamed it the “Cramp Zapper”, as it is the only object known to possess such magic in the human world. By simply plugging this pouch into an electrical source, heat is spontaneously emitted onto whichever body part you chose!

This is not any normal heat, however, this heat is crafted from the depths of numerous hot springs in the distant heavily kingdom, and is sent down to Earth to sooth away aches and cramps, specifically the menstrual ones! Nothing works quite like it, and in fact, not even medicinal benefits can outweigh the immediate relief this belly warmer provides.

Of course, us Mooninites to not reproduce in such a fashion and therefore we do not them for belly-warming purposes, but we’ve found that they sooth third-arm cramps quite nicely. Before winter settles in and cramps intensity, take a Cramp Zapper home to your asteroid today!

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