If you’re reading this, I know I’m dead.

I’m not the “dear diary,” type, but this is important. You know that, Maris.

This diary is going to be the last thing you will find of me.

First off, Maris, I’m sorry you had to find me like this. I couldn’t bear to see you in pain.

I want to say to avoid karma, Maris. It’s a mirror of the life you lived. So as queen, beloved sister, please make the most of the life you will live. I love you very very much.

I’m not scared, trust me. I deserve it.

Second thing, Maris, I have a secret and a lie to tell you. The secret is that I’ve hidden a book in the castle library for you to find. It’s called “The Life of The Queen.” It’s about mother. I hope you like it. The lie is that I’m not scared. I’m afraid. What will it look like? Will it be painful? The physician I have consulted said it will not be. I’m scared. I’m so scared I’m insane.

I’ve lied this whole letter! Oh, dear Maris, you can’t be reading this because you’re dead too. Since I’m going to die anyway, I put a poison in your cup.

I love you, dear sister! I won’t be seeing you.