I’m looking into his hazel eyes. I feel like they see right through me. All of my thoughts and emotions might as well be out on display. There’s something else there though. Confusion. A question. Does he really not understand the way I feel?

“I can hardly stand being around you. I’m so aware of every move that you make. Every time you walk in a room, I can recognize your presence before I’ve even seen you. When your attention is on me it feels like I’m burning up. Like every nerve ending is white hot and I’ll combust at any moment.”

He continues to stare, not speaking a word. Just taking me all in with those deep searching eyes.

“When I look in your eyes, I feel my heart crack, because I know that you’re fine without me. You go about your day, and take care of everything you have to take care of without a single thought of me inhibiting you. But you’re all I think about. I can’t seem to get you off my mind, and I know I need to forget you, but that’s impossible for me.”

He takes a deep breath never breaking my gaze. I can see anger rising in his eyes.

“You have no idea what I think about, or how I feel, so don’t act like you do.”

I’m taken aback by his tone. His eyes soften and his shoulders sag just a little.

“It wouldn’t matter how we feel anyway because you and I can never be together. Our families would never forgive us. Are you really ready to sacrifice that?”

I hesitate to answer that. He is right, our families would be furious, but they would eventually accept it, right?

He goes on “I couldn’t let you do that. If you ended up having regret down the road, I would hate myself for giving in and not trying to stop us.”

Tears sting the backs of my eyes. He’s making valid points, and I’m an emotional wreck per usual. I know that he’s right but that doesn’t ease the ache in my chest. The longing that I feel in my bones to be near him.

“Come on. We have to go back before people come to look for us.”

All I can muster is a nod, and then I force my feet to carry me back to the party.