Tammy sits on a frumpy plaid couch from the 70s with her legs and arms crossed. Her hands buried in their long sleeves. Beside her is her husband Mark, sitting spread eagle with his arms crossed over his chest. Seated in front of them is a crusty faced elderly man dressed frumpier than the couch.

"So, what brings you both in today?" Dr. Bryan asked.

John and Jane looked at each other and then back at the therapist. "We're having some problems with our sex life," Mark said.

Dr. Smith nodded understandingly. "What kind of problems are you experiencing?"

Tammy cleared her throat. “Well, first of all, when Mark is focusing on me he usually does things that he thinks are good moves. And then when I ask he to do something that I specifically want he falls back into what he was doing before. He doesn’t put in the effort. when it comes to something I want done to me.”

Mark cuts in, “Well if we’re gonna complain about lack of effort. What about your lack of effort when you go down on me? Huh? It feels like it’s only lasts a few minutes and then you just tap out and whine ‘My jaw’s tired, my arms are tired, my neck hurts.’”

“A few minutes? It takes you forever to finish! You last through six episodes of Bob’s Burgers! SIX EPISODES! That’s two hours Mark. And you wonder why I’m tapping out?!”

Dr. Bryan held up his hands. "Okay, let's take a step back and try to approach this in a more constructive way. Mark, it's important to consider your partner's boundaries and feelings. And Tammy, it's great that you communicate when you’re feeling uncomfortable and it’s ok to slow things down and take breaks. It doesn’t have to be a continuous sprint to the finish line.”

Tammy side eyes Mark with a perfectly threaded arched eyebrow. Mark looks at his feet. Dr. Bryan nods. "I understand both of your perspectives. How about this: why don't you both take a few minutes and make a list of things that you want to do in the bedroom, and then you can discuss and come to a compromise on what to try together?"

Mark and Tammy look at each other and then back at the therapist. They nod, “Sure, okay.” Dr. Bryan hands them each a note pad and pen.

After a few minutes Dr. Bryan asks, “Are we ready to share? Tammy would you like to share first?” Tammy nods. “Well I like it when we do interesting positions but I just wish they were more ergonomic. I’d like to get a yoga swing and hang it from the beams or something. Or even have like a custom chair or couch that’s shaped for the positions we like to have sex in. And I’d like to be louder but I don’t like that we have thin walls. I wanna have like a secret room with lots of soup proofing.”

“You want a secret sex dungeon,” Mark asks incredulously.

“Well not a dungeon but, yeah, a secret sex room where no one can hear us scream.” Mark looks at Tammy wide-eyed, a smiling growing on his face.

As they leave the therapy session, Mark turns onto the road opposite of their usual way home. “Hey, where are you going,” Tammy asks.

Mark smiles, “Home Depot. Got a secret sex room to build.” Tammy’s smile grows ear to ear.