Blank. Disconnect. There’s nothing.

So how come my body fizzes with tension. Every movement aches, pulls, strains. My muscles, my sinew fight against the stress. Their efforts to escape instead contracting everything into one clump. One solid vibrating mass.

My blood riots inside me. My throat full of bees. But when I try form a sentence to release the swarm, my mind has nothing.

A void. A cell. A box that holds a black hole. A cacophony rains down outside it. Fracturing the surface. Disrupting, interrupting disconnecting the synapses. Nothing.

So why do my limbs shake? Ghosts of thoughts race and fly and haunt my brain but I can’t grab them. My limbs shake too hard to have grip, my thoughts evaporate too quickly and I’m left with nothing.

I try to be whole. I try to fill the gaps. Too big to call cracks. But the soul is too flat. I am fractured.