CW: Violence, Bullying, Suicide

They all thought that he’d saved her. They were calling him a ‘hero’.

He could never let them discover the truth…

Panic made bile rise in his throat. His fingers tugged at his hair as he paced back and forth within his bedroom. Would she tell them? Would the my believe her? No, right now they’d think she was just being hysterical. Curtis gave a manic laugh as he fell onto his bed and placed his head in his hands.

“There’s no way they’d believe that stupid bitch…” Curtis mumbled to himself. His brown eyes remained wide as he looked down towards his knees. His right leg bounced up and down as he sat. He wanted to convince himself, but the nagging sensation in the pit of his stomach wouldn’t rest.

If they learned the truth… his life would be ruined. What they had seen was a brave high school football star who heroically grabbed a depressed underclassman before she could jump from the fifth story of the school building. They could never know that he had been trying to shove her from the roof. They could never know that his sleeve had somehow gotten stuck to her bag. A teacher had spotted him grab her backpack and ran over to help him bring her down. The perception of the teacher, what they thought they had seen, spread quickly as the inconsolable, manic, young woman was practically carried through the school and shipped off to a grippy sock vacation.

How long could he keep playing the hero?

Of course he had gone along with the story. He had been seconds away from getting caught. Seconds from the truth being known. Curtis made a guttural sound as he clenched his jaw and squeezed his head between his hands. The teachers rarely ever came onto the roof. That one must have seemed them. Probably came to check on them. Had the teacher arrived a second earlier, had they overheard him teasing the underclassman … had they heard him tell her she didn’t deserve to live…

But no, the teacher didn’t see that. No one but Sarah knew all of the awful things he had said to her. Only she heard the threats, the vulgarity… Only Sarah, who was probably medicated and locked in a nice padded room, knew that he had planned on watching her skull hit the pavement.

How long would it take before people would start believing her? Would she tell them? When they’d pulled her from the roof she hadn’t been able to form the words. Sobs, screams, and incomprehensible gibberish had all been drowned in tears as Sarah was dragged away. Curtis was a hero. He had saved her from herself.

Would they learn that he was the reason she was up there? The reason she almost died? Or would they think she was lying, trying to get attention by trash talking her hero. After all, she was a nobody. A quiet little nerd who nobody liked. She had been so easy to manipulate, so easy to drive to the edge… She probably would have jumped on her own if he’d been more patient.

Now… she could ruin his life.

“Damn it, damn it, damn it.” He covered his mouth to keep his parents from hearing. He struggled to breathe through his panic. He struggled to convince himself that everything would be ok.

“If she does tell them, I’ll just say she’s lying.” Curtis whispered as his lips turned up in a manic grin.

“Yeah, who are they going to believe: the school hero or some fucked up nobody?” He laughed as he ran a hand through his hair. He stood once more and walked over to a shelf littered with trophies.

“She’s crazy. I did save her. That’s right. I bet that dumb bitch will learn to appreciate life now, huh?”Curtis picked up one of his trophies and toyed with it in his hands.

“It only makes sense that I’m the hero. I saved her life. She would have done it anyway. She went up there with me. It’s been her choice all along.” His hands shook as he placed the trophy back on the shelf. The trophy wobbled and tipped over. The other awards fell in turn, knocked over like dominos and sent crashing to the floor.

Curtis laughed. He placed a hand over his face as he sunk down into his knees. Tears ran between his fingers as the laughter turned to sobs.

“Fuck. They’re gonna know. I’ll loose my place on the team, my scholarships… I could go to jail. It’ll be all her fault!” He shook, breaths coming in quick sharp gasps.

“I just need to make sure she doesn’t talk. Maybe I can visit her at the hospital. Yeah. Make it look like she killed herself there. Then no one will know.” Curtis smiled though tears continued to flow down his cheeks.

“It’ll be tragic: local hero goes to visit the girl he saved only to find her dead in her hospital bed. She can’t tell anyone if she’s dead!” Curtis cackled.

He had never heard the door to his bedroom open behind him… His parents, who had heard the sound of the trophies crashing downstairs, stared down at their son in horror.