“I need you to listen to me very carefully. You don’t know me, but I know you.”

The fuck.

“Uuuuh, okay. Bye.”

“Wait! Wait. I just need you to listen to my story. I promise you, this is worth your time!”

The person calling me sounds androgynous. Almost weirdly so, like the perfect mix between masculine and feminine. I know I’m putting a lot of emphasis on this when literally the first words this rando said on the phone was pretty stalkery, but it sounds kind of alien.

“Prove it.”

“Your name is Whuddya Mean, your father likes pickles, your mother always rode on that incredibly ugly green bike to work, in 7th grade you had a crush on-“

“Okay, okay! I’m calling the police! Also, my mom’s bike didn’t look that bad!”

“Once again, please wait! I have some very important instructions! Just go down into the cellar at 11:30 pm. It will protect you. From everything.”

“Fuck off, dude! I’m dialing 911. I’m putting your creepy ass into-“

*click

The weirdo hung up. Rude.

I called the police, they showed up at my house, broke apart my phone for a reason or another, and said they got all the information you needed. They suggested a patrol near my house, but I said no. People just loitering by my house creeps me out.

I didn’t sleep well that night. Other than the stalker the message kept with me. That last part they said was particularly serious and ominous. It was close to 11:30. Might as well look at the cellar.

I went down and inspected everything. Nothing was out of place or abnormal. I was going to go back up when a boom sounded out.

I quickly went upstairs to inspect everything. Some of my miscellaneous items were on the floor. That’s fine. Nothing breakable. I went outside.

The sky was green, and there was no one around. It wasn’t even night anymore. Also, shouldn’t there be people? That was a big sound. I debated going to look, but nope. I’m not that type. I’m going to stay in my house till morning.

I turned around and a thousand floating, bloodshot eyes stared at me.

“Ah, sorry. I meant the attic. Not the cellar. Next time I guess,” the inhuman God said from another realm.

Then it left, and I was alone with the staring eyes.