Hmmm…..even the notes themselves are chicken scratch, not to mention the title. I look out among the people: man, woman, child, and in some cases dog. I clear my throat and decide on a few choice words to begin a speech that hopefully will not end in my slaughter by thousands of angry villagers.

To be clear, I have no idea where I am. I ended up in this 1800’s-like village by accident, and honestly, who would want to come here on purpose? I miss the tech boom of the 2080’s already, where my device would immediately see my predicament and produce an immaculate lecture, even for these primitives, leaving them with the best truth of their lives.

Instead, I am currently standing on a box about 2 feet tall, staring into thousands of steely-eyes Viking rednecks in the middle of who knows where. Well, seeing as no sudden epiphany of knowledge is coming, I have but one choice.

“Gentlemen,” I begin. And immediately realize it may not have been the best way to start. These are not gentlemen. They are-are….“Warriors!” I thunder, looking around. Aha! That is it! Good. One word down, A LOT to go. “You are strong as the mightiest giant! As brave as King David facing Goliath! And-“ I search for one more simile. “Fearless as a mountain lion! But….why do we battle each other? Why is it that we, as humans, the most intelligent and ruler of species of all the world, kill each other out? Why must we pit one against the other, man vs man, in a world already so dangerous made by-by creatures of the forest?” The words are tumbling out now; whatever I say next, it is not my choice anymore. “And thus, I implore of all you: put down the spear! Throw away your bow and arrows! And treat your fellow man like you would yourself!” I breathe heavily looking around. And then, as one, they all begin to clap. I step down. Maybe it won’t be so bad after all.