He loved her. He always had. Since before he had built up the courage to start their first conversation, he’d felt something like never before. He’d noticed her a few weeks before, at the counter in the coffee shop. She was so beautiful. Her hair was what had attracted him. Bright auburn. It was out of a bottle, he’d been annoyed to discover later, but it was what had first caught his eye that morning. That had been five month ago. Time flies, he thought. And even now, as they say across the table from each other, her beauty hadn’t faded. She is everything to me, he told himself again in that moment.

She’s wearing the necklace I gave her, he smiled. The light of the candle between them flickered in the small emerald, casting a small green glow onto her chest. And the dress. She always dressed so perfectly. He’d loved watching her get ready for work each morning. Sitting by the window, he’d watch her as she danced across the room to her favourite music, pulling on her jeans and shirts. Each time, she was in her own little world, and never noticed him watching her.

He’d imagined they would grow old together. Maybe leave the city and move out west, somewhere more peaceful and quieter. She’d always wanted a dog. Nothing too big, he hoped. He didn’t like dogs, not since the incident with the Ralfmann’s dog. That had scared him. He didn’t like to think about it.

Even now, as he stared into her eyes, he wished things had been different. They could have had a different life together. If she’d only have accepted him for who he was, he wouldn’t have had to do things this way. They could have been happy together, he was certain of this. But she hadn’t paid any attention to him, beyond asking him to repeat his coffee. How fucking hard was it to remember what he ordered every morning? The same drink, every day. He hadn’t wanted to hurt her. But she didn’t take him seriously. Now, as the candle burned down, the scars on her neck were harder to see. He’d tried to cover them, many times, but they were beginning to fester. It had been five months now. Time flies, he thought