“I know where all the missing socks go.”

Detective Socky McSock glanced up at the young sock that had entered his office.

“I’m sorry?” McSock asked, leaning across his desk, suddenly intrigued. The Case Of The Missing Sock-Persons was a case his task force had been working on for sixty-eight days. They’d had 0 suspects and 0 leads, and all the dead ends were giving McSock a sockgraine.

The first sock to disappear was Jardyce Sockton, a five month-old bar hostess from Primark. She had taken an outing to a friend’s club, The Washing Mac, and hadn’t returned home to her drawer the next morning. Word spread quickly around the community when her fiancé Gerald Thompsock reported her officially missing after she did not turn up for a week.

Linda Sockylen, a senior sockizen identifiable by the tear in her fifth toe, went to fetch groceries on the morning of Saturday 11th June, barely 14 days after Jardyce’s disappearance. Linda did not return to her cupboard, leaving her long time partner John Sockoe in considerable stress. Her drawer cohort sent out an appeal to the public offering stitching to anyone who could come forward with information related to Linda’s whereabouts.

Three more victims, whose names their families chose not to share, also vanished around the same area. None of them had been found in the two months since the case had been assigned to Detective Socky McSock.

So to see this young sock standing in Socky’s office, boldly claiming to know where the missing socks had vanished to, was an astonishing sight for Detective McSock.

“Take me to the socks.”