As the bustling sound of conversation and laughter echoed throughout the dining hall, I faltered my gaze to his. How could I even begin? As I stared into his eyes, he was no longer a man, but a boy. A boy who would shout with glee of his dream to be a royal knight, who would run up and down the harbor and tell the townspeople of who he’d become. A boy who had begged me to join in on his dream. A boy who had only convinced me because I love him, a secret I would take to my grave.

“Theo.” I call to him as I begin to muster the courage to hinder his life long ambition.

“Yes Oliver?” He questions, confusion spreading across his face.

“I-“ my words stuck in my throat as I had never been one to speak up until now.

“I know how late it is to say this now, but-“ I turn away from his pondering look, too ashamed to face him.

“Being a knight, it’s just not for me. Now I know what you’re thinking, ‘Why now? Why on the night of our initiation into knighthood?’ Well, I’ve thought about it and, I’m just not cut out for this.” I sigh in relief of release from my burden.

“I know.” I turn my head to Theo at his quick response. He knew? What does that imply? Could he also know about-

“You’ve always been drawn away from others and I just thought, well maybe a push was all you needed. But I can see it clearly now that we’ve grown, you’re not meant to be a knight. No, from what I’ve seen,” Theo grabs my hands, a spark in his eyes shines, one I’ve always seen when we were young. Maybe he does know and what if? What if he feels the same?

“Oliver, you were born to be a mage! Your abilities far surpass our teachers at th**e **academy!” How foolish! Ha! That’s exactly what I love about Theo, always there to pull me from my delusions.

“I just want to live alone Theo, have some land and live out my days. A mage? That’s a fools dream! Just what I’m saying is, I don’t want that life. I want a calm and quiet one, not an adventure like you.” I place his hands down on the table.

“I wish you well on your journey for I won’t be there to accompany you. Thank you Theo, I don’t know how I would’ve made it this far without you.” I unsheath my sword and place it upon the ground next to him. Tears fill my eyes as I turn away from him and walk out. This love of mine isn’t fair and I’m afraid it never will be.