Rejection Hurts

The school roof top was silent. Kate was glad that there wouldn’t be any witnesses for her potential humiliation. Walking towards the chain link fence, she saw the notorious Grigori Alexeyev. His long ash blonde hair sat in a messy bun on his head. a few stray strands floating around glacial pupils as a cigarette balanced on his full bottom lip.

“I love you.” Kate said defiantly, a blush appearing on her pale cheeks.

‘What?’ She scolded herself internally. This was the first time in ten minutes Grigori had said anything.

Grigori removed the unlit cigerette from his mouth and turned to look at Kate. Why should he even waste his time listening to her?

Kate took a deep breath and tried again. “Grigori… I don’t know what it is about you that draws me to you like this, but I can’t stop thinking about you. You make my body go crazy. All I want is you.”

Grigori didn’t say anything; instead, he moved so that his front was against the fence, facing away from Kate. Placing the cigarette back in his mouth, he lit it up with ease; his fingers expertly caressing the lighter’s edge.

“Why are you telling me this?”, he said coolly, looking at her expectantly.

Kate felt her heart sink. He wasn’t going to accept her confession. “I have no idea! But I just wanted to let you know.”

He finally looked back towards her. His face held no emotion. The only thing giving him away was the smoke escaping from his mouth and nose. He exhaled slowly.

“I’m not right for you. Choose someone else.” his voice was deep and gravelly and Kate internally shuddered at the strong Russian accent.

“I’ll never find anyone better than you.” Kate responded with conviction.

Suddenly, Grigori flicked the last part of the cigarette onto the floor and began walking towards the exit to the roof. “Well, then, maybe we’ll meet again.” As he walked away , his footsteps sounded loud against the empty rooftop.

When he was gone, Kate collapsed onto the cold wooden bench and cried.

‘Oh god, why do I keep messing things up!? Why did I say those things?! It was all stupid! Why couldn’t I have just accepted his rejection gracefully? Oh God…’ Kate sobbed into her palms and buried her face deeper into them. Tears fell down her face until she couldn’t see anything anymore.

A few minutes later, the door flew open. Looking up, Kate saw that it was Erin.

“Hey, Kate! Are you okay? What happened??” Erin asked, rushing over to her.

“Erin, I messed everything up!” Kate wailed, still crying.

“What do you mean?” Erin asked, sitting next to Kate.

“I told him I loved him. And he said he wasn’t right for me.” Kate explained miserably, tears falling down her cheeks.

Erin was quiet for a moment before she responded.

“That sucks, but I’m sure he didn’t want to hurt you. Maybe he doesn’t feel the same way about you. That doesn’t necessarily mean it’s hopeless. Besides, he could just have been upset about something, right?”

“No! Don’t you get it, Erin?! He rejected me! Because I said I love him, he left!” Kate snapped angrily, raising her voice at the last sentence.

“Okay, calm down, you aren’t helping anything. Maybe he didn’t reject you, maybe he is actually just trying to protect you from himself. Who knows?” Erin replied calmly.

“But he looked so emotionless when he was leaving! He couldn’t wait to get away from me!” Kate continued to cry.

“Maybe he just didn’t want to see you crying. Come on, you gotta pull yourself together. There is always tomorrow.” Erin patted Kate’s arm comfortingly.

“It’s Saturday tomorrow. How am I supposed to sleep knowing that Grigori will think of me as that idiot who refused to accept his rejection?” Kate moaned.

“You need to get some sleep! Don’t let Grigori ruin your weekend.” Erin gave her an encouraging smile.

With the help of Erin, Kate managed to stand and begin to make her way out of exit, cursing Grigori for making her late home. However, as soon as she got close enough to the school gates, she stopped and turned around. Her gaze wandered across the empty roof top, a figure stood watching her.

A smirk played at the corners of Grigori’s lips and he blew another puff of smoke towards the sky. He watched Kate standing, staring up at him. He hoped that she would leave soon. He watched with interest as Kate walked quickly out of the gate and disappeared.

He had been so shocked when she confessed to him that he had to push her away, lie to her, stop himself from telling the truth. He wasn’t good enough for her. She was light and he was darkness, she wouldn’t survive in his world where allies became enemies and people stepped on one another to reach the top. If he was honest with himself, he knew that there was nothing he could offer her.

His dark thoughts were interrupted by a shrill whistle. Grigori looked towards where the noise had come from, a few of his friends were waving and beckoning to him from the gate. After a couple moments of silence he returned their smiles and waved. The group waited as Grigori made his way over. He placed his hands in his pocket casually and began to walk.

“So, what took you so long? Another girl confessing her undying love? Wait….is it a boy this time?”

“Shut up, Nikolai!” said Grigori as he made a half hearted attempt at swatting the back of his friends head. At the last moment Nikolai laughed and quickly ducked.

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