anyone but me

Kiara has always fallen in love so parachutingeasily. The first she could remember is in first grade with a little boy named Ethan Morris. What she found attractive about him was that he was the fastest boy during PE. Kiara figured he liked her too because when she wore a periwinkle purple bow to school he complimented it. She knew then he was the boy she was going to marry. Bows and periwinkle purple were her favorite things from then on because Kiara never forgot that.

Kiara grew older and so did her obsession with boys. "I like you, from anynomys," she wrote on a sticknote in 3rd grade. She passed it to her friend with a whisper "give this to Oliver." She used her brunette hair to cover her face as she freaked out awaiting an answer. In less than 5 minutes it was returned with the response of: "who are you?" She was hesitant to share her identity to him but she did. She wrote her name with a heart next to it. Again she gave it to her friend but it was brought back to her faster than before. she unfolded the sticky note and instead of the "i like you too," she had expected she was hit by a "ew you're ugly." Kiara never forgot that.

In 6th grade, she found a new boy. She was wearing a shirt of her favorite color, periwinkle purple, when two boys came up to her and her friends. They kept leaving her out of every conversation, and she soon realized those two boys wanted to talk to her friends not her. Then she remembered what Oliver had said to her and reminded herself, "No boy will like me, im too ugly." She backed up from the group and she noticed a skinny brunette boy who had come along with the boys, but didn't want to talk to the girls. She stared at him, and wondered if he would like her. As she thought, he looked up and said, "What are you looking at fattie?!" She wanted to cry. She wanted to go home and hug her mom. "Fat and ugly is what I am." Kiara never forgot that. When she would get hungry she would remember what he said.

Last time she fell in love was her freshman year of high school. Finn was not a conventionally attractive boy, but in her eyes he was the most handsome man. During lunch, she was on her phone while others mingled. He tapped on her shoulder and she looked up. She saw him and he saw her. He hesitated on his words, "I think you're very pretty, and i wanted to get your number." His voice wasn't deep but wasn't high either. Kiara found comfort in that. "Are you playing a joke on me?" She questioned. No boy had ever come up to her with actual intentions of getting to know her. "Yes, obviously!" she smiled at him, and he looked starstruck. "Fine," she said. Kiara gave him her phone, "Put your number in." He did as he was told, then gave her back her phone and walked away. She looked at the name he saved his name as and repeated it back to herself. "Finn." She never forgot his name.

A few months into talking they hung out at Finn's house. In Finn's room they were laughing. Finn looked at her longingly and smiled. "What?" She asked.

"I don't know. I guess it's just... I've never met anyone like you!"

"You should be grateful for that." She said half jokingly, half not.

Finn grabbed her hand and she looked at him. "What's that supposed to mean?"

"It's just that I'm so ugly, and fat, and I've got a horrible personality. You could have anyone, but me-"

"But I'm here with you. The prettiest lady in the world. The most perfect woman in the world. You are anything but ugly. You are anything but fat." And Kiara never forgot that. With Finn, Kiara felt pretty. With Finn, Kiara felt like she could eat. Kiara felt that she could breathe as long as Finn was the air she was breathing.

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