I just did this as a quick “cold write” scene/start of a story, without too much revising and editing. I’m curious - do you think this would read better written in 3rd person rather than 1st?

*****

Stinging cold water hit my face as I paddled. The drop splashed up as I paddled furiously, the oars slicing through the water. My chest was heaving with the exertion and fear. My lungs burned and my arms ached.

This wasn’t meant to be an arduous task. It was supposed to have been a relaxing canoe ride, drifting down the river, taking in the scenery, breathing in the fresh air. Now, I was paddling for my life, trying to resist the temptation to turn around and see how far behind my pursuers were.

Slice, splash, sting. Slice, splash, sting. It became a beat to paddle to, to focus on. My breath was coming in gasps and I could feel the terror building in my chest, squeezing it tight. Hysteria starting bubbling up and soon it was not just the icy water stinging my eyes. Shit, now my vision was blurry as well as my glasses. I daren’t stop paddling to wipe them clean though; I just blinked furiously and shook my head a few times.

Stifling a sob, I pulled even harder on the oars. My arms were burning; I knew I couldn’t keep up this pace forever. I strained my ears to listen for any sounds to indicate the men were close. I couldn’t hear anything which I hoped meant I was far enough in front.

I paused, and turned my head, only to see an oar rapidly filling my vision. I tried to duck but it was no use. The oar hit me square across the face, sending me flying backward with the impact, over the edge of the canoe and into the freezing, dark water.