Wish I Could Go Back

I leave

For the first time.

It’s New Years Eve,

And you both come

To say goodbye.

Even though it’s Michigan,

And December,

And six AM,

And your twelfth birthday.


I’m gone

For four months.

We text each other

Every single day,

And play Roblox together.

It’s great, but I can’t see you.

And then I text you all:

My parents have bought

A house. In Florida.


But I come back,

And you all come

To say hello

When I get home.

Come running out

To my backyard

Screaming, hugging me

And lifting me off my feet.

You even share your sandwich.


I leave again

Seven months later.

And no one comes

To say goodbye.

But after all,

It is Michigan,

And November.

And you all text me

While I’m driving away.


I come back

Six months later.

A whole half a year.

And no one is there

To greet me,

But you say

“We’re at her house.

Come join us!”

And so I go.


I leave again,

Three months later.

Do you come to say

goodbye this time?

I don’t remember.

I can’t remember.

But I leave,

After a great summer.

Was it great?


It’s July

When I come back.

And there is no one.

You all text me

“I’m with friends.

I’ll see you tomorrow.”

And you do,

But only for

Fifteen minutes.


When I leave again,

After only a month,

There is no one

To watch me go.

I don’t know

What happened.

Was it me?

I just leave again

With my heart breaking.

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