I turned the pocket knife over in my hands, running my thumb over the intricate design of its handle. Though the knife had long been cleaned, there were still times that I swore I still saw red lodged between the depressions of the wooden handle; times where I swore that I could see her reflection peering over my shoulder when I stared too long into the mirrored edge of the blade.

“Sir, are you ready?”, Grant asked. I nodded quickly and slipped the knife into my pocket before he could see it.

Grant, a tall man with broad shoulders and a black tailored suit cleared his throat. He stared at me awkwardly for a while before hesitantly speaking.

“Nervous?”, he prodded, fiddling with the watch on his wrist. Grant was the guard who was tasked with the job of dropping me off at my home today. He was a huge wall of a guy and seemed to prefer quietness over conversation, but I appreciated that he checked in on me now and again.

I forced a smile on my face. “I’m seeing my kids again for the first time in ten years, of course I’m nervous”, I replied, looking in front of me at the familiar dark oak door of the home I haven’t seen in years.

The last time I saw Olive and Aaron, they were both barely six years old, with ruddy pink cheeks and messy blond curls. That was ten years ago, the night my wife, Matilda, and I left them behind. We dropped them off at their aunts and two days later, we were at the space station, geared up and prepped for the greatest mission in recent years. Mati and I were about to embark on a exhibition that most astronauts could only dream of fulfilling. We would do a round trip to the new, unidentified planet that had recently been spotted in our solar system and bring back soil samples. As far as we could tell from observation, its atmosphere seemed perfectly liveable and after years of sending rovers to the planet, it was now deemed ready for human exploration. The trip would take 8 years and the ships resources would only be able to sustain 2 people, but Mati and I were the best in our field and were easily first choice for the task. Complications along the way ended up extending the trip by a whole 2 years and Mati and I were away from home longer than we anticipated.

Mati had insisted that her sister move into the house to care for the children while we were away . She thought it important that they grew up in their childhood home, but I knew she wanted to be able to come back to it after the trip. She loved this home like a second skin. It was unfortunate, really, that she never made it back to see it again.

I took a deep breath and turned to Grant who gave me a reassuring nod. I raised my fist and knocked.

Almost immediately the door swung open and on the other side there was a tall, willowy girl with a heart shaped face and high cheekbones. Her blond hair are less messy and her body a lot taller and slimmed out, but those eyes- those bright green eyes she inherited from her mother, were still the same.

The girls eyes widened in surprise and she froze, unable to move as her breath caught in her throat.

“Olive?”, I said hoarsely as I looked at my little girl who was now only a few inches shorter than me.

“D-dad?”, Olive stuttered, unfreezing and pulling the door open.

“Aaron, he’s here!”, she screamed over her shoulder before lunging towards me and wrapping her arms around my torso. I pulled her into me, hugging her as if ten years of not seeing her grow and change could be solved by squeezing her tight enough. Her face nuzzled into my neck and I could hear her whimpering, leaving wet tears that soaked through my shirt.

Movement from behind her caught my attention and I looked up. A broad chested boy, still dressed in his football uniform looked up at me. His blonde hair had been cropped short and he looked much different than he did before, but there was no denying who he was.

He dropped the helmet that was in his hands and raced towards me. Olive had just enough time to pull away from me before he pulled me towards him, hugging me with so much force that I almost toppled over. He’s a whole head taller than me now and I found myself enveloped in his scent as he engulfed me.

When he pulled away I see that his eyes are damp.

“Dad…I…I missed you”, Aaron said, his words raw with emotion. I pulled Olive towards me and kissed the top of her head before pulling Aaron into another hug.

I nodded, my head too clouded with joy to say anything else.

They guided me further into the house and I turned quickly in time to see Grant walk out and shut the door behind him. He’ll likely be waiting in the car until I called him to let him know he’s dismissed.

The twins immediately launched into conversation, asking me question after question and filling me in on everything I’ve missed.

We didn’t mention what happened to their mother, but her absence was a heavy presence in the room. Olive and Aaron, as well as the rest of the world, believed Mati passed away when the auxiliary vehicle she was using to fix the outer hull went awry. According to the story, the tiny one person ship meant for unsuitable environments and outer ship repairs had somehow lost fuel and floated away from the ship, taking Mati along with it. With her body out there, floating somewhere in the vast unknown, there was no evidence to disprove the story…the story I had made everyone believe.

A knock at the front door interrupted our conversation and I went to open it. Grant stood on the other side. Breathless and heaving.

“Grant. What…what’s going on?”, I asked.

“Get in the car now sir, we have to go”

I frowned at him and looked over my shoulder at the kids who were still seated on the couch.

“Can this wait? We were just about to watch a movie”

“Unfortunately not sir, the station called. They want you there urgently”, Grant replied.

I crossed my arms, irritated that they couldn’t even give me one day with my kids after a decade of not seeing them.

“No I’m not going anywhere with-“

“Sir, please. It’s very important”, Grant interrupted, his eyes screaming with urgency.

“What do they want now?”

Grant hesitated for a second then sighed, deciding that the only way to get me to go with him was to tell the truth.

“I-I don’t know how to tell you this but….Prime Helper 673 just landed. They have a team on site now but there’s confirmation that there’s one living body on board”

If possible, I stopped breathing completely.

No, no, no.

That’s wasn’t possible. Mati was the only one on the auxiliary vehicle. It would be impossible that she survived all this time alone on board the tiny ship without resources.

That’s not the only reason it was impossible she was alive though.

Mati was dead, this I knew. I had been the one to stab her and stuff her dead body on board the Prime Helper 673. It was impossible that they had found a living body, absolutely impossible. The pocket knife burned in my pocket, as though it wanted to sear right through the cloth and confess what it had done.

Just then Grants phone dinged and he pulled it out of his pocket, eyes scanning over a text message. His face went impossibly pale and he looked up at me with wide eyes. It was the first time I had ever seen the stoic man so spooked.

“Sir, we have to go right now. They have just confirmed that the survivor is Matilada Greenwood. Your wife”