She squins in her sleep as she’s woken by a sharp light behind her eyelids. She turns her head away from the light and stretches making sure to keep hold of the book she fell asleep with in hand. Breathing in the beautiful musty smell of her library she allows her eyes to slowly slide open and -

She screams.

“Again? This is the 3rd time this month.”

Erin Garen is a short but sturdy woman. Her long black hair is always tied back into a tight bun, never letting a stray hair out. Her tight skeleton like hands are sitting on her hips and her pointy shoes tap impatiently.

“I’m trying to beat my record.” Cassie mumbles.

She gets a sharp slap on the side of her her head. Followed by the skeleton fingers grabbing her ear.

The women turns and drags the girl stumbling away from the window.

Cassie begs her apologies down the hallway. When Garen lets go she doesn’t say anything but gives Cassie her mastered death stare. And Cassie leads the way to the study.

Cassie pulls her hair into a practiced bun like Garen’s and straightens her long black mourning dress still rumbled from her nap.

“You are first in line Cassandra. You need to be taking this seriously.” Garen sternly says to Cassie as soon as they both walk into the room.

“I didn’t want this. I never wanted this” Cassie hisses back turning to look at Garen. “I wanted to live my life as far away as possible from here.”

“It is your duty! To your nation and to your family, Gods keep them safe.” Garen bows her head at the end and Cassie mirrors her. Garen continues, “they lost their lives protecting this country and that is now your destiny. Running off into your own little worlds won’t work anymore.”

“I cannot rule. You cannot make me.”

“Then you will watch your country fall into ruin where the only thing that can survive are the ghosts.”

Cassie pauses at this sentence, “what?”

“You are the only one. The next in line is but an infant. Cassandra you will rule this country as your father requested you to. Whatever you believe, he knew you would be capable when the time came.”

“Capable? He shunned me for YEARS for not wanting the throne. He spent all the 22 years of my life telling me I’m something I’m not. And he’s not going to do that to me now.”

At this, Garen sighs and lowers herself into the chair next to her, “Cassie,” the immediate change in Garen unnerves her. She’s never called her Cassie. The woman that now sits in front of Cassie is a shell of who she was a second ago. “Miss. Garen?” Cassie mumbles as she kneels on the floor in front of that old lady.

“Senra is looking for a way into the throne. They’ve been at it for years as you know, but now’s their chance and they’re trying to take it.”

Cassie stares at the floor in shock “why didn’t you tell me?”

“Because you weren’t ready.”

They both sit in silence allowing the confession to hover in the air around them.

“Just give me one more night. And then I will rule as my father would have wanted.” Cassie says more to herself. She stands and leaves the room trying to ignore the muffled cries of Garen behind her.

Cassie walks the halls, studying the walls and rooms. Watching mother bake in the kitchen and her sister playing the piano. Tag in the gardens was always their favorite as kids. Even doing her homework with her father in his study.

But once’s she’s back in the comfort of her room she’s angrier at her father than before she left Garen. It’s dark out now while she stumbles around.

“How dare he.” Cassie mumbles,

“Capable? After all these years the only compliment you give me is after death,” she shoves her legs into jeans,

“I didn’t want this. I never wanted this,” she yanks the sweater over her head and makes sure the bun is still secured.

“Even in death you still found a way to control my life.” She closes her door beind her and strides down the hallway once again.

Being careful to hide in the shadows away from the guards, she slips through the halls. Only once’s she’s in the kitchen and quickly glances around does she pull her hood off and find her window and makes her way over to it.

“Casandra.”

Cassie freezes, she’s been caught before but now it’s different.

Turning around she’s makes eye contact with Garen. Cassie curses to herself but doesn’t break eye contact.

“I’m going. One more night. I promise. I just-“

Garen interrupts her, “I know,”

She holds up the car keys, “figured I could save you from the rose bushes this time.”

Cassie shocked, but smiling steps forward to grab the keys before they’re yanked away.

“But just this time. Do whatever it is you need to do to grieve. But I need you ready to come back and get to work. I will be here but you need to be here too.” Garen sets the keys on the countertop between them and crosses her arms.

“I’ll be back, I promise.” Still smiling Cassie grabs the keys and steps away. “Thank you.” She says sincerely.

Garen gives a small rare smile and turns away. Cassie takes this as her sign and slips through the window like she’s done a hundred times.

Now running through trees and shadows towards her car, Cassie wishes she grabbed a jacket.

Knowing she’ll have to sit for longer she hopes the guard took an early night like usual. And when she peaks through the door slot it’s just as she hoped. The lights are off except for the dim emergency signs. And her beautiful midnight purple hellcat sits where Cassie left it.

Knowing the guards wouldn’t be as forgiving as Garen, Cassie does a look around the building, and up the road towards where the guards sleep. Nothing. She just has to get passed the gate and she’s free.

Once more slipping through a window, Cassie runs her hand over the hood of her car. This is all she’s wanted to do with her life. Ride, drive, and fix cars. Cassie was so determined to be opposite of her perfect sister that she accidentally found her dream life. And now she’s mourning that life along with her family.

The garage is mostly soundproof, and she still cringes slightly as she starts her car. She allows the vibration on the engine in her seat to fill her bones, setting every nerve on fire in anticipation.

But as usual she sets the car in neutral and carefully guides her out of the garage. It used to take her forever, getting caught almost every other time, but it’s different now, she’s can’t get caught.

Reaching the gate Cassie types the code, careful to not make a mistake and set off the alarm.

The last time she did that Cassie was surrounded by guards within seconds and minutes later her mother was beside her. She smiles to herself as she remembers the lecture for that one. The staff shook their heads in disapproval for a whole day and her sister laughed in her face through breakfast, lunch, and dinner for an entire week too.

With the gate closing behind Cassie she hops in her car and doesn’t leave first gear till she’s far enough away.

And finally on a main road, she lets go.

The weeks of hidden greving catch up. All the funeral planning, her future as ruler planing, signing papers upon papers, staff coming and going all with frowns when they see her.

As Cassie makes it to the highway she starts to pass cars. They become blurs beside her. The roar of her engine filling her bones again, but this time she doesn’t feel anything.

Garen telling her the bad news in a new sad voice as a car flies behind her.

Seeing the mangled corpse of the planes body knowing her family is in there, runway lights look like stars blurring by.

The normal open casket now closed hiding the horror within, three cars on either side of her slip behind.

The thousands of people mourning their rulers while staring into her dead eyes, red and blue lights are behind her but she doesn’t care.

The freshly placed dirt where her family lays forever six feet under, faster.

Sleep holds nightmares like shadows in the dark, need to get away. Hide.

Dinners are quiet now too, no.

“I will be here but you need to be here too.” Cassie blinks the image of Garen away and she’s downtown. White knuckling the steering wheel she takes her foot of the gas. The helicopters lights sweep over her once, twice, and locked. She swerves around the few cars as sirens and lights get closer. Turning off to an empty street she floors it.

She’s woken by a sharp light behind her eyelids.

Cursing Garen at waking her again, Cassie lays still, breathing in the beautiful musty smell of her library.

Her face hurts, although she doesn’t know why. Cassie reaches down to grab her head, down?

Her vision is blurred when she opens her eyes, but she sees the brilliance of the red and blue lights.

She blinks, the spike strip. She rolled her car.

Panicking now, Cassie looks around. She’s upside down and her body hurts. Stupidly, she tugs at her seatbelt, and then presses the release. Gravity pulls Cassie to the ground, and she crawls out her broken front windshield. Cassie rolls over and lays on her back and comes face to face with the barrel of a gun.

“You’re under arrest,“

“No shit.”