Missy took a deep breath. it was the day to do it it. This had been going on for too long. it was the day to tell her best friend she is in love with her. Joanne with superb gaydar, with her dark eyes, with the stare that seemed like it saw directly into her mind and into her soul every time she looked at her. Missy shot another glance at herself in the mirror, fixed her bowtie, grabbed herschool back pack and ran to catch the bus. Nothing and no one will distract her this time.

There she was - standing next to her locker, surrounded by their group of chatty friends and laughing happily at a joke Jones had probably just made. Looking impossibly gorgeous with her brilliant smile, her poppy knots tied with bright yellow ties, her magnetic energy, Missy realised how much she was both envious of the effortlessness with which Joanie conmected with other people and radiated confidence, as well as how totally she was crushing on her. As usual, Joanie must have sensed her presence, as she turned her head towards the main entrance of the school, caught Missy’s eyes, smiled widely and waved. Missy felt her knees turn into soup, same soup that also filled her lungs and made it hard to breathe. She tried to calm herself down by briefly closing here eyes and taking a deep breath. “It’s all going to be fine. Just go there, ask her to the side, tell her you like her. It’s all going to be fine.” When she opened her eyes again, she saw Joanie’s standing only fingers in front of her, with a serious look on her face. Joanie’s gently grabbed her forearm. “Let’s go outside,” she said while pulling her back out. Missy was confused. What was happening? “Is everything okay?” “All good,” said Joanie while leading her, “I just need to tell you something.”

Missy started lowkey hyperventilating. Is Joanie going to tell her she loves her too? Did she fail an exam? Did someone die? Her still-soupy legs barely held her while she was trying to run behind Joanie who was leading her to the low cherry bushes growing to the left of the main entrance, their usual hiding spot they during free periods. Joanie pulled apart some branches and allowed Missy to sit in the flat, soft centre of the bush, joining her soon after. As every time in this spot, Missy’s brain became overwhelmed with thoughts of Joanie’s mouth on her mouth, her dark hands sensually moving down her back, her palm cupping her - … “Can you please stop your thoughts?”

“What?”

“Can you please just … stop thinking for a second?”

The request was so random that Missy snapped out of her fantasies. “Is everything okay?” she asked again.

“I need to tell you something,” responded Joanie. “So do I,” said Missy, but Joanie put her hand up. “Please let me go first.”

Joanie took a deep breath and looked into Missy’s eyes. “Missy,” she started. “I know you like me.”

Missy felt her blood freezing in her veins. Her heartbeat was in her throat, she could barely breathe. This was the moment of truth. Joanie either likes her back or she does not.

“I know you like my yellow hair ties this morning. I also know you sing the alphabet to yourself when you’re bored.”

Missy looked at her quizzically. Another random comment out of nowhere. “That is … true. How do you know about the alphabet?”

“I am sorry. There is no easy way to say this.” Joanie gave her another intense look, but she seemed nervous. “I can read minds.”

Missy blinked. Then she exploded with laughter. This is why she loved Joanie. Her level of empathy always enabled her to do and say the right thing. In this case, she made a potentially intense situation lighter through humour. “Good one, Jo,” said Missy and patted back her skirt that had become disheveled.

“I”m serious, Missy,” said Jo with a stern tone. “Try me.”

“Fine,” said Missy, who would have preferred to go back to a different conversation, despite of how difficult it might be. “What am I thinking of now?”

“About how annoyed you are with this conversation. But that was obvious. Do something else.”

Missy rolled her eyes and thought of her favourite horse. “you’re thinking of Steven. And now of marshmallows. And now you’re singing the alphabet.”

Joanie stopped. Missy was staring at her incredulously. “What is happening right now?” asked Missy almost angrily.

Joanie, realising Missy is believing her, relaxed and made herself more comfortable. “Are you ready?”

“I’ve been able to do this since as long as I can remember. It’s genetic, so my dad got me up to speed quite early, maybe around age 5. He’s trained me how to use it and i cam quite easily tune it out, like a radio station in the mall. Which is great because i don’t have to listen to all the hornballs that are the boys in our class.”

Missy, who remained quiet, felt a hot flush up her cheeks as she remembered her own thoughts about Joanie’s body in this very bush. Joanie was looking her with a knowing gaze, but with a hint of a smile on her lips. “I don’t mind your thoughts. I quite enjoy them,” she said to Missy’s horrified look. “I am aware how much of an invasion of privacy this is. I am so sorry. Especially because i knew how you felt about me this entire time.”

Missy felt confused. Angry about Joanie roaming around in her most private thoughts for her own amusement. And never reciprocating, which might mean just one. “Why didn’t you tell me? Why didn’t you block me out? Do you enjoy feeling adored seeing me suffer? And also … why are you telling me now?”

Joanie seemed crestfallen. “I really am sorry. I did try to block you out. I know it’s no excuse, but your alphabet song during Geography brings me happiness. I love the feeling of freedom you feel when you’re riding Steven. I like how you react to colours. And yes, I like seeing how you are seeing me. I knew you tried to tell me how you feel a few times now, and i have prevented it because I didn’t want to have to tell you about me. I was afraid you would hate me or thought i was a freak. Today i saw how decided you were. That’s why i am telling you now. And also … because i really like you too.”