I must have been on that park bench at least two weeks before anyone even glanced at me. A further week around the square until anyone talked to me, and only then it was “Get out of my way, tramp!” It took an entire month of my being homeless before I heard any sort of kindness, and when it did come, it came in the form of a cockney redhead woman dressed up to the nines.

“Alright, love?” She said, as she sat down on the bench next to mine and lit up a smoke. I looked around me; nobody else there. I checked her ears; no bluetooth headset. She was talking to me.

“Uh... I, uh... I’m fine, thank you very much for asking.” She said nothing back, only nodded.

“How are you?”

“Well now you’re talkin’, love. I’ve ‘ad one hell of a day! Pardon my French.” She giggled, “So I woke up this mornin’ and only turns out my fat lump of an ‘usband ain’t there so I gives him a ring and he says he’s fucked off ‘cause he found out I’ve been havin’ a little fun on the side, but, well, who cares? I don’t need his money I’ve got my family’s!” As she laughed at this hysterically I could only think how ungrateful she seemed towards her own family. I’d kill to have a wife so willing to love me and work to help support me. But, I guess it wasn’t my business to judge her. She continued “So I told him to shove it and I thought I’d have a fun day out on my own for once to celebrate! Well I’m not usually on my own, you see, I’ve got tons of friends that won’t leave me alone. So, anyway, I go to the spa thinkin’ I’ll get myself a nice tan on, you know, and who do I meet there but Jeanette! Jeanette’s my retarded sister, you know, so I told her about me and Stan - that’s my ‘usband - and she said that Dad wouldn’t like it, but I know my Daddy better than she does on account of me being older, but I called him anyway and he said I was cut off!” She waited a split second for me to reply, but before I could, she spurted “I know! ‘Ow fuckin’ dare he! So I ‘ung up on ‘im, slapped my sister in her bitchy face ‘cause I know she told him he should cut me off, I stole her credit cards and now I’m on my way to Paris!”

I didn’t have the faintest idea what to say.

“Paris is one of my friends. She runs the county job fair up the road. You wanna come along? You can have one of my ‘usband’s suits layin’ in the boot.”

All this time I thought I needed money to make me happy and grateful. I accepted the woman’s offer, and from then on accepted whatever hand life dealt me.