Not sure if it’s intentional, but I like the long sentence structure in the opening paragraph because it creates distance between whatever happened ‘then’ and the character’s present. The length mirrors a slow revelation.👏🏼👏🏼
However, this can be achieved in the second sentence. I suggest you revise the first sentence and omit the words “reveal to me”
You could actually scrub the first clause and replace it with “I saw” and it would still keep its punch.
“(I saw) One incriminating picture at a time” is revealing and engaging in itself concerning the narrative. It drew me in.
💡 Perhaps something like “My history laid bare, I saw one incriminating picture at a time/after another” (just a suggestion).
This would also resolve repeating ‘My past’ in such close proximity (“my past locked away” is a keeper).
Second paragraph: I would break the first clause to create more tension “I was a teacher finally.” Finally feels final and a perfect place to end a sentence. Followed by “I couldn’t let these photos get leaked…”
‘get leaked’ is a little questionable (personal taste). I’d have to ponder on that term a little longer. 🤔
Lastly, I would change the punctuation of the last sentence. If I really want to repeat “consequences” (for emphasis), I would phrase it like:
“I had to keep my past locked away or (else) dire consequences would occur. Consequences far worse than losing my job.” It feels like a natural break. The shorter sharper phrasing feels more like decision-making. The kind of decision-making one makes when panicked by fear.
These are of course just suggestions.
I find it challenging to reveal so much in few words and here, you’ve done a great job whilst giving me food for thought. Thanks 😊
