The aliens were putting Josh and Jill through the ringer. Communicating in both their own language and perfect English, they’d asked Josh and Jill a hundred questions about themselves and their habits . At the current moment, they’d setup an obstacle course of some kind. It looked like an Olympic decathlon.

“We are testing you to see hock is the finest specimen,” announced Glorp, the translator. His one yellow eye darting between Josh and Jill.

Jill was burning with jealousy. Josh was six feet and change, well built and Jill felt he had some idea that no matter what the task would be, Josh was going to make a show of beating her. This didn’t sit well with Jill. After all, she was in shape too. Jill was not about to be bested when representing the human race to outsiders. No, no. She was determined to succeed for the reputation of womankind. If these aliens were going to take notes about what the average human does, she was bound and determined for their notes to say “Subject Jill was the winner.”

Jill pushed herself and it paid off. She blasted past Josh in the 100 meter dash, destroyed him in the long jump; she excelled at shot put from her years of softball, but Josh’s long legs got him ahead in the high jumps. The 400 meters ended with a brutal tie. There was an intermission during which Jill fumed, silently. She was not going to be beat if it took her life.

The next portion started with 110 meter hurdles. Jill flew over each hurdle until the very end, when she missed the penultimate hurdle and was knocked to the ground. Josh took the round. Jill clenched her fists so tightly in anger she nearly drew blood from her palms.

Jill’s softball training came in handy again during the discus throw, a challenge she won; her lightness served her well in the pole vault. The javelin throw went to Josh - his long arms and developed upper body gave him an advantage. It came down to the 1500 meters.

Jill was perspiring with hatred. She was not going to let Josh win. If she had to sabotage him, she would.

Glorp raised one of his tentacles to the sky and fired his ray fun. They were off.

Josh’s long legs and huge stride took him further and further ahead. Jill’s rage propelled her forward. She closed the gap. Josh pulled ahead. Jill gained and took the lead. Josh was closing in. Neck and neck each lap, the end was in sight - they were beside each other sprinting toward it.

Josh started to pull ahead, Jill forced herself forward. She thought her nose may have started bleeding but that wasn’t going to slow her down. Finally, Jill had an inspiration. Sabotage it was.

“Hey Josh,” she shouted at him, “look over here!” As Josh turned his head toward her, Jill lifted her shirt above her head and flashed her breasts at Josh. He fell for it. Literally. Josh tripped with surprise allowing Jill to pull ahead and finish first.

Glorp proudly named Jill the winner and started leading her away from Josh.

“What do I get for winning?” Asked Jill.

“Well being that you have won the test for the finer specimen, you will be the human was use as sustenance this evening,” replied Glorp.

“Sustenance?! You mean this was an audition to be your dinner?” asked Jill in terror.

“Yes. You proved the better specimen and shall therefore be the one we happily ingest. The inferior being has been sent back to Earth. Congratulations, I’m sure this is an honor for you,” replied Glorp.

Glorp then wrapped one of his tentacles around Jill’s mouth and injected her with a tranquilizing serum.

Jill was the tastiest human Glorp and his comrades had enjoyed yet.