_[fast forward]_

I applied my mascara with the precision I used in my collage applications. My eyeliner, a wing tip so sharp it could draw blood. A dangerous sort of beauty.

I glanced at the clock and a smile broke out and danced on my lips.

My morning routine was running five minutes ahead of schedule.

Today was going to be perfect.

After one last fit check- a casual pastel yellow sundress that I adored- I walked outside to my car.

Driving to school was less hectic today due to my punctuality.

I found my usual parking spot open, pulled in and waited.

Turning up my music I did some homework I had to get done before first period.

And then,

There he was.

Reed Montgomery.

Six one, messy blonde hair, gorgeously tanned, eyes a color the ocean would be jealous of, captain of the swim team, and well, perfect.

My boyfriend.

Or, to-be-boyfriend.

I’d already laid out all the ground work.

In my AP calculus class, I’d been funny and cute for several weeks. I’d let him help me with my homework though, I’d never needed it.

And then got his number in a meet cute way asking for it while complimenting his brilliant intellect.

Then, later texting him for “homework help” and innocently getting sidetracked having interesting and fun small talk conversation.

I’d name dropped homecoming several times, so I’m sure that is in the process of becoming a reality.

Now all that was left was have him ask me out on a date to solidify any doubts. Then, he will be mine.

Like A squared plus B squared, I’d made everything fall into place for C squared. Followed every step.

I was excited to see the results.

The bell rang and I casually walked to first period, hoping to bump into Reed, but he was nowhere to be seen. But the day was young.

I handed in my completed homework and sat down in my first block to endure the next hour and ten minutes of lecture.

My spirits fell slightly as the rest of the day I was not able to randomly run into Reed, but my hopes for after tonight were high. Everything would be perfect.

As I walked with my friends to the parking lot, Reina spoke up after checking her phone.

“Uggggh. I only got an seventy three on Mr Dalingos test. I might actually drop that class. How did you guys do?”

In sync the rest of us- Mayn, Sue, Loren, and I- pulled out our phones to check. Like I’d expected, I got full marks.

“One hundred.”

The girls groaned at my response. And I giggled as they continued to talk about their scores, lamenting over lows and comparing highs, comforting those that didn’t do as well.

As we made it to our cars Mayn invited us to go get ice cream to cope with their score induced sadness. They all piled in the cars and Mayn rolled down the drivers side window.

“You coming Lissy??”

I smiled thinking of the plan I had to execute. The anticipation making me nervous.

“Next time. You guys go, I’ll catch ya later.”

She frowned and tilted her head.

“You sure?”

I nodded and made the most universal sign for “read” in ASL, the sign I’d adopted when I wanted to mention Reed while still being discreet.

Her eyes widened and she grinned knowingly.

“Kay, see you later then! Text me!”

I watched her reverse and drive away with all my friends. Part of me wanted to go with them, but I had a boyfriend to get. I set to work. It had to be perfect.

I went home and did my homework and then picked out a new outfit that is more appropriate, but still cute, to wear to our school’s swim meet. Faded jeans and cream colored corduroy jacket. As I left the front door I placed my extra set of car keys on the counter and drove to the pool with a grin.

I watched in a dreamy daze as Reed led his team to the victory. He is amazing.

I wondered if he set any new records tonight. Everyone on the team is fast, but none like Reed.

The team got out of the pool and my face colored a bit and I got on my phone to distract myself.

People started emptying the bleachers to go home.

It was time.

I waited as the team was congratulated and enough people had left, the parking lot was almost empty.

I sat on the hood of my car. My keys sitting in my cup holder locked inside.

The minutes ticked by while I waited.

Reed was the last to leave the pool and I was ready.

“Lissy?”

My name in his mouth made my heart patter.

“Hey Reed, great meet.”

He rubbed his towel over his hair and smiled.

“Thanks. What are you still doing here?”

I laughed and pretended to look embarrassed, which wasn’t hard. I was flustered talking to him.

“I locked my keys in my car.”

He chuckled and tossed his own car keys in the air and caught them.

“Little miss organized locked her car keys in her car?”

I smiled and shrugged.

“Yeah. First time for everything right?”

He nodded thoughtfully

“Yeah I guess so,” and then just like I knew he would,

“You want a ride home?”

I smirked. Phase one complete.

“Can I DJ?”

We drove along to the songs that made me think of him and songs I thought would make him think of me. The perfect playlist to make us fall madly in love. I made small talk waiting for him to ask me out but as we got closer to my house I got worried.

“So, you going to homecoming?”

I asked picking at my jeans.

Reed shook his head.

“Nah.”

Warning signs went off in my head.

“Really? Why not??”

Reed shrugged turning onto my street per my instructions.

“Not really my scene. Me and a couple buddies are gonna go for a weekend trip to the mountains.”

I shallowed feeling everything falling out of my control. I searched for a way to salvage my plan.

“Fun.”

He nodded smiling.

“That’s the hope. You? Homecoming I mean?”

I chuckled and answered distractedly,

“Yeah, maybe with some friends.”

He stopped the car in front of my house.

“Fun.”

I smiled trying not to show how disappointed I felt.

“That’s the hope.”

I reached for the door handle but hesitated.

It was now or never.

“Reed, would you like to do something together some time?”

His smile faded a bit.

“Oh.”

I raised my eyebrows waiting for him to continue.

He sighed and ran a hand through his still damp hair distracting me.

“Listen Lissy, I just want to be clear, but I don’t want to upset you.”

My stomach twisted.

“I don’t-I don’t like you like that. I can tell you’ve been maybe into me?”

He chuckled, rambling.

“Gosh I’m awkward. I could be wrong I just wanted to be honest with you and not lead you on. I’m sorry.”

My heart felt crushed. But I also felt mad. After all the work I’d done. The hours I spent working towards trying to get him to like me.

“What do you mean?? I thought—I—I’ve done everything right, I did all the things that are right for the start of a relationship. What do you mean you don’t like me like that??”

I tried not to get hysterical. I realized then, I wasn’t used to not getting my way.

Reed sighed.

“That’s kind of just it, Lissy. You’re trying too hard. You’re well, perfect. You did everything right. Too right. You’re not-” He winced, “Real.” He said finishing.

I was mad when tears sprung into my eyes. He was wrong. I wasn’t like that. I wasn’t.

“How could you say that? I’m not perfect. Even still how could you not like me if I did everything right?? You should like me. That’s how it is supposed to end. Supposed to work.”

Reed gently placed a hand on my shoulder.

“I’m not a math problem, Lissy. Which by the way is clear to me that your very good at. You don’t need to pretend to be dumb for a guy. You’re very smart and someone’s going to love you for it someday.”

The tears slid down my face.

“Just not you.”

Reed retracted his hand like I’d slapped it away with my words.

“No. I’m sorry, Lissy.”

I sniffed and looked up to keep more tears from falling.

Reed gently spoke again.

“Do you even really like me? Or is it that I’m the perfect fit for your ideals? I know a lot of the guys you’ve gone for, and looking at myself, at face value we are similar.”

I cut a glare at him.

“Seriously?”

I refused to consider his point.

I started to get out of the car done with Reed and this conversation.

“Lissy, wait.”

I turned back around.

“You’re wrong about me.”

His face crumpled into something like regret and guilt but worst of all: pity.

I slammed the door and walked up the steps of my porch before going inside and slamming the front door too.

He was wrong.

I let more tears run down my face as pieces of my heart fell to the floor for the first boy

I truly knew I loved.

“”You’re not real Lissy. Everything you do is so perfect. Even me. I’m exactly the kind of guy people would expect you to go for. Do you really even like me?””